These are Tolstoy's entries in his diaries in the last year of his life. Tolstoy was a difficult and brilliant man. He struggled all his life with the issues of Self, of God, of consciousness, of living an authentic life and we see in these entries that this struggle ended only with his death. It is a bit sad and depressing.
He wrote diaries--that is he wrote both a 'public' one which his wife could read, and then 'one for myself alone' which he hid from his wife. And not just at the end of his life, but throughout their lives together, diary-writing was a way to talk honestly to each other--to the torment of both. Sophia Andreevna, just before she married Lev Tolstoy at the age of 18 (he was 35), read Lev's diary with his insistence in which he confessed his sexual exploits. Sophia was appalled. At the end of Tolstoy's life, having lived 48 years together, he could not understand her need for his affection. She was seen as hysterical, emotionally unstable, and in desperate need of control of her husband's affairs. I'm probably in the minority, but I always felt some sympathy for her. She blamed Chertkov for Tolstoy's loss of love for her, and she's not entirely wrong.
What is most interesting to me in reading these diaries is the whole issue of honesty. Why does one write a diary, if not to be totally honest with one's self at least. But it's never that easy. Can one be totally and completely honest with another person? My fear with diaries is that when I write in my diary, it is usually when I am most upset by something, and it is then that my honesty knows no boundaries--no softening or cushioning. If someone I love would read it, it would be devastating. Honesty is often a knife. It seems to me that when one has been together with someone for a long, long time, it is much harder to be completely honest--there is too much that can hurt, and the last thing one wants to do after so many years together is actually hurt the other person. But, then, how can one be completely honest? Tolstoy had no answer. Neither do I. ( )

This book is a gem. It captures some of Tolstoy's inner mind, which, at least in these diaries, can seem both confused and brilliant. The conflict between aristocrat, philosopher and theologian is evident in almost every entry and the real essence of Tolstoy's genius is captured in a unique way. ( )