Sue Klebold

A book written by one of the Columbine shooters’ mother. Not exactly the lightest of reads. But it is also a book with a message thaT begs to be told. Hence why I gave it a high rating. Indeed sometimes I skimmed pages; sometimes the truth was a lot to handle in these COVID times and I just couldn’t....but I am glad I read this book.

Those who know me know just how much of an issue mental health is for me. Sue Kleibold admits that so much needs to be done in this area.....even going so fair as to saying things should be considered “brain health”....because maybe then it will be taken seriously. Maybe crimes could be prevented.

If you expect a story of a mother excusing away her son’s guilt, this isn’t it. Sue makes it clear that she abhors her Dylan’s actions. If you also expect to hear how jacked up Dylan’s home life was.....be prepared to be surprised. Children are resilient in rough home situations. But evilness can also happen in a home where love exists and is practiced. Sue shares her guilt and confusion over that dreadful day. And yet, she also reconciles still loving her son.

I was only 9 when Columbine happened. I have lived through way more school shootings since then (I distinctly remember Sandy Hook). But the fact that these still happen shakes me to my core. No, mental health diagnoses doesn’t solve the problem....but less stigma about getting help would go a long way… (meer)

In this tragic memoir, Sue Klebold tells about her grief journey in the aftermath of her son shooting teens in the Columbine school shooting. It’s not an apology – and it shouldn’t be. It’s a recognition that she’s a mother too, that she lost her son, too. But when I say it like that, it makes it sound like she’s begging you to recognize that. She’s not. She’s just trying to explain that perhaps if she had been aware of suicide risks, she may have prevented her son’s involvement in the shooting, but that she (like many moms of suicidal teens) was blindsided by inexperience. This book is a plea for other moms to recognize the signs and help their kids.… (meer)

You can't help but feel tremendous sympathy for Sue Klebold after reading this book about the time leading up to her son, Dylan's, actions (both murder and suicide) at Columbine High School and the aftermath. This book strikes me as a very honest rendering of her feelings all the way through - whether denial, guilt, sorrow, horror. I also can sense her personality and her obsessive thinking about what has happened to her son. Her story is one I feel is very relatable. There were signs of problems, but it was also easy to push those signs to the side. She really struggles with that dichotomy. Things she thought weren't all that important, turned out to be very telling. But only in hindsight does this become clear.

Sue does a very good job of juxtaposing her journals with those of her son. The structure of the book is excellent, and I had a very hard time putting it down. For some reason, I had trouble awarding that fifth star, not because it wasn't well done, but because it was somewhat hard for me to truly ascertain the underlying motivation for writing it. On some level, the book seems to be saying that those with mental illness are not usually violent, but in this case mental illness was an uncontrollable driving factor. Yet, I'm not sure the facts as presented necessarily lead to that conclusion.

My fear is that this book can be interpreted as rationalizing by those who choose to judge. Her conclusions seem plausible to me, but also show that when it comes to our loved ones, we will hang our love on the thinnest strand of belief in order to continue to justify our love for that person. I felt I could really relate to Sue because it is only natural to hold out hope that our children will emerge as a positive force in the world, regardless of evidence to the contrary. To drop that belief is something that no parent should be called upon to do.

Very compelling and scary read. All I can say is I sincerely wish Sue peace of mind, something that has been understandably very, very elusive for her. I think, after all she has been through, she deserves acceptance, peace and kindness if nothing else.… (meer)