Anne Roiphe

Very good book. daughter is on the street, drugs, 3 abortions, Mother expects to find her one day in the back alley with overdose. daughter goes to Israel with a boy and gets involved into a Jewish religious cult. Mother is educated, women's rights advocate and has a difficult time with her daughter giving up "all her self and her "rights" to be in this religious cult. The mother has a difficult time choosing "which is more important--living according to religious cult rules, getting married, having 12 kids, all about taking care of husband and family...or freedom of the open world--where the daughter was "lost". very good book… (meer)

FRUITFUL (1996) is a book I've had on my shelf for several years now, from a bulk buy when I'd just read a few other Anne Roiphe books, most notably her later memoirs, EPILOGUE and ART AND MADNESS. I first read her work more than fifty years ago, when her UP THE SANDBOX! was a bestseller and was adapted to the screen with Barbara Streisand starring.

This one is a kind of combination or hybrid of memoir and a deep dive into the feminist movement which resurfaces about once a decade. Roiphe herself seems ambivalent about it, and is definitely doubtful of the more strident man-hating members. She has been married twice, divorced the first time (from an alcoholic writer), and widowed the second time after a long happy marriage. She has struggled as a single mother and a stepmother, and has three daughters, one of whom is a recovered drug addict. And the real focus here is motherhood, something Roiphe loved, and had even wanted more children. She quietly notes that, despite the pill and legalized abortion, the "pull to reproduce was not a political decision but deeply primordial, a response to rhythms and tides not always accessible to reason."

And, regarding men, "there are many things that I have liked about men." And she goes on to mention their smell, their hairiness, how she feels "protected" by men and also how she has protected them. She was obviously very lucky in her second marriage, from all she has to say about her husband (a doctor).

I took my time reading this book, because it gives you so much to think about - husbands, wives, fathers, mothers, childhood, becoming adults and more. As an old school husband/father, patterned after my own dad, I found myself often wincing guiltily as Roiphe talked about the new kind of father, who is more involved in hands-on parenting. Although FRUITFUL was published more than twenty-five years ago, it remains extremely relevant when it comes to the core ideas here - feminism, parenting and, most of all, mothers and motherhood. I will recommend it very highly - to BOTH mothers AND fathers.

- Tim Bazzett, author of the memoir, BOOKLOVER… (meer)