Jonathan Shaw

UGH!!!
I tore thru this so quickly in 48 hours and then ran into the shower after finishing this book. I had to cleanse myself of all sins, to rejoice in my somewhat calm, loving, successful and steady normalcy of present life.
That being said, I have known, loved and LOST quite a few Narcisa's in my life.
You never forget them. You never stop caring. They are an ever present pain you feel in your heart.
I worked along side them for years in the ever pleasant "meat factory", forced to watch them down spiral while keeping my nose (and body) clean. I offered hugs, tidbits of sound advice and love.... only to be a witness to their constant climb and plummet down- and I mean down - deep into the depths of hell. Most never returned, and some are hanging on by the skin of their teeth.
If only they treated their body like a temple, if only they discovered their worth, if only they knew that people loved them, if only they could see their beauty, if only if only if only. It doesn't end.
If you ever worked in a "meat factory" (first off: you will know slang) , you already have a few images of the girls you have known, loved, lost to bad monkeys.
My images of Narcisa's are a kaleidoscope of memories I try to forget.
Some memories of my Narcisa's:
Pretty blonde girl falling asleep with her forehead pressed against the mirror while applying blush.
RIP Destiny
Gorgeous brunette falling asleep with a cigarette in her hand - some of her acrylic tips were missing. Man she looked like Natalie Portman in Black Swan when she danced. Lit up the room.
RIP Onyx
Pretty girl falling straight to the ground smashing her head open, blood everywhere, she was still laughing, high as a KITE.
Me, drunk - peering into face of a pretty young blonde who probably had no idea where she was "You know you are loved by so many people right?"

This is the love story of dysfunctional addicts. This is the gritty reality of what is happening behind the scenes of the pretty girl with the bad monkey on her back, and the unhealthy asshole boyfriend who does whatever he can to keep her satiated while satisfying his own addiction.
This was exhausting, and I mean, mentally I am spent.
This book helped me get inside my narcisa's mind, I was also able to get inside their asshole boyfriends enabler mind, and all of it opened my eyes to just how DEEP their torment went.
It is desolate, hilarious, relentless, bat shit crazy, harrowing.
Don't walk into this book with a pretentious holier then thou pre-judgment. Really, save it for something that covers another topic. This is NOT the time to be snooty.
After this novel you will feel exhausted, battered, unclean, disgusting... and if you are able to write a book that provokes my raw honesty and vulnerability, which in turn forced me to write this testament of truth- you deserve 5 solid stars.
Thank you for sharing your story with us Mr. Shaw! Look forward to your next one!… (meer)