Thomas: Lord Byron was my greatest foe. If I had flesh, and this were Byron himself, I would damn well run him through! He stole my verse, my destiny, and now he is to steal the woman of my dreams!

Kitty: You say every woman is the woman of your dreams.

Thomas: I have a lot of dreams! And most of them are about women...apart from the one where I have the body of a crab.

Alison: I hate to tell you this, but that's Kylie Minogue.

Thomas: What is a Ky-lee-meen-ogue?

Robin: Before you was moonah. Before house was moonah. Everything come, everything go. But always there. Moonah.

The Captain: Who would you like to hear speak more- me or Thomas?

Mary...Be there a third option?

Fanny: It was my husband, George. I caught him 'pon the groundskeeper, with the butler 'pon him!

Julian: It's actually known as a Moroccan Tea Party.