Meh. I’m disappointed. But I guess I deserved that. I don’t know what I’d expected out of a short about a murderous stalker Santa…

This was boring, weird and cheesy — in that exact order. Kris, our “Father Christmas,” was a spectacularly dull narrator. The first pages barely managed to keep my attention. Unfortunately, his POV is the only one here.

Things got weird when Kris became somewhat fixated on Jack — I say ‘somewhat,’ because he was pretty boring for a stalker, he just watched his stalkee with no real emotions behind it — and right off the bat, started breaking limbs and killing the baddies in Jack’s vicinity, no questions asked. He was like Terminator, only more efficient because he could teleport using some sort of magical subspace.

The weird continued when Jack decided it would be a good idea to have sex with the big and slightly violent stranger that kept randomly appearing in his apartment. There was almost zero chemistry, the sexy bits were not, and I simply wanted to skip them.

Oh, I almost forgot! There was one moderately interesting part, right before the cheesy one, when the stalker vibes briefly intensified as our Santa decided he’d like to keep Jack forever and ever in the aforementioned magical subspace, Gollum-style. Surprisingly, Jack reacted like a normal person: he did not take that shit well. Sadly, this part was very short.

The cheesy part was probably supposed to be sweet and fluffy, I think? And maybe it was, but by that time I was already so fed up with this seemingly short story that it was just too much. Suffice to say that there’s a candy-cane-sweet HEA, so if that’s your thing… go right ahead. ( )