I wish I had been able to read this book under circumstances that would have allowed me to dip in and out and skip around rather than under circumstances that necessitated me reading the whole thing, which brought out which elements were repetitive and shallow. (I don't need to see any more commentary from people who claim they don't have white privilege because their lives have been hard because they don't understand that all that means is that their race isn't something that makes their life harder.)

Fascinating telling of Michele Norris' project "The Race Card". Have loved inviting Ms Norris in my home via NPR. Nice to have her on my bookshelf, too. Will look for her earlier memoir based on her family. ( )

Our Hidden Conversations by Michele Norris is a fascinating journey through the many thoughts Americans have about race and identity.

I think the book description gives a good enough idea of how the responses in this book came to be, so I will focus more on what the book itself does. Responses are grouped loosely and to good effect. Comments that might support as well as disagree with each other are close together, usually on the same page. Longer responses and the periodic background piece written by Norris helps connect each section.

I actually read this almost two months ago and thought I had reviewed it already. The reason I thought that speaks directly to one of the positive things this book can do. I brought up some of these comments to friends, across races and to the extent I could across the political spectrum (I admittedly don't have as many right-wing friends as I once did, and we disagree on the explanation, so I won't get into it). Because I explained the concept of the book and exchanged ideas with people, I just assumed I had posted a review. It wasn't until I saw it in my reader in a folder that doesn't hold reviewed books, that I discovered my error. Yet those conversations were great, always insightful, sometimes frustrating, sometimes a bit sad, but also very good at bringing us together.

You'll see comments you can relate to and some you find unfathomable. Reading them in the groups in which they're placed, with many being longer than the original prompt asked for, you move beyond just nodding or shaking your head and begin to see some nuance, some perspectives you might not have considered. Most of all, you see the human beings behind these comments. Maybe not the specific person for each, but a composite that reminds you that perspective, even one you disagree with, offers a way to connect and understand. Not agree, not condone, but understand nonetheless. If you can be honest with yourself you'll likely recognize yourself in some of the comments you now disagree with, maybe even see some remnants of thoughts that you have since left behind. And, if you're white, you'll hopefully see that what seems like a small slight to you can represent a potential threat to someone else in certain situations.

Basically, this book puts individuals to ideas. Maybe vague thoughts you've had, maybe ways you know family members or friends to be, when put into words are so impactful. Some intolerance sounds so asinine when put into words, and some incidents that seem small you'll see are large when someone feels they are directed at them.

While I would certainly recommend this to anyone wanting to understand some of the ideas permeating our culture I think it would make an excellent book to use as a discussion guide. Start conversations with friends and relatives, and not just those who might think as you do. Discuss, genuinely discuss, these comments and how you all view them. Try to bracket any anger or frustration and look instead for common ground and understanding. Even if no one walks away changed on the spot, the discussion will linger in everyone's minds and change may yet occur.

Reviewed from a copy made available by the publisher via NetGalley. ( )