Kathryn Jarvis

The blurb for A Red Door led me to expect an AIDS memoir, but there is very little in this memoir about Jarvis' family's ordeal with AIDS. After a cheating scandal, Jarvis separated from her husband (understandably) and from thereon in the book, there is little about HIV or AIDS. Much of the book is really a memoir of a crumbling marriage. She often writes about needing to put her kids first, and while this is a short memoir, the mom in me got an icky feeling from this book - there are so many scenes where the kids are left alone in a car, or witness to their parents violent disagreements. For all of the conversations rehashed line by line (odd, given that some wouldn't be memorable later, and the memoir recalls events from the late 80s-early 90s) Jarvis never mentions talking to her children about their father's illness or impending death, about their legal (or physical) separation, or why they are continuously shuffled about from friends' houses, on tour with their father, at one of two homes with their mother, at their grandparents, or numerous other locales.

This is a short memoir, but it felt like work to finish it (I kept wrongly expecting more about HIV or AIDS). The writing is clunky and the grammar atrocious - it seemed as if the commas were placed haphazardly throughout the book, with no rhyme or reason. I often had to reread sentences multiple times to understand them. I hate leaving so many negative remarks about a memoir, but this was a truly disappointing and frustrating read.… (meer)

Hard not to approach this story without expecting to experience some level of emotional response. The author writes from the heart and is very candid in her portrayal of events. While there is an enormous emotional/physical toll and social stigmatism associated with a medical diagnosis of HIV-positive - especially during the 1980s setting for this autobiographical story - it is the secret life her husband had lead and his controlling behaviour, even as the disease was taking over, that makes this such a one-two gut punch. To properly appreciate this one and why the low rating from me, I have to break this review down a bit. This story gets a solid 4.5 stars for capturing the medical information and the social stigmatism of the era. The author nails this. Where I rip my hair out in frustration is the portrayal of their marriage in crisis. It was definitely in crisis, but I point the finger at both parties for creating such an emotionally charged marriage meltdown. Yes, her husband wasn't a saint but she made some decisions that fueled the flames on their imploding marriage (which I won't go into here as that would require some spoiler alerts). I really struggled to feel sympathy for either of them (outside of the very sad medical diagnosis). At one point, I almost abandoned this book, I was that annoyed with what was playing out. My sympathy lies squarely with their two children.

Overall, this book might make for a good book club choice given that there are so many ethical topics to examine and discuss.… (meer)

The book is beautifully written but often painful to read. It takes us back to a time when AIDS was something that many families found themselves victim to either directly or indirectly.. The family in this story is literally torn apart… not only by this devastating disease but by the actions of a loved and trusted family member. In spite of the topic and the heartache that you can almost feel seeping through the pages…it is diffidently a worthwhile and entertaining read.

I received a complimentary copy of this book from Black Rose Writing Publishers in exchange for an honest opinion. The views expressed by this reviewer are entirely my own.… (meer)