Great book on the basics of attending ceremonies of religions you aren't part of. If you're in this situation and want to make sure you don't offend, it's perfect. If you just want a introduction to any of the religions in this book, it's a great resource. ( )

How to Be a Perfect Stranger: The Essential Religious Etiquette Handbook edited by Stuart M. Matlins and Arthur J. Magida. Imagine you have a Jewish coworker who invites you to her temple for her daughter’s bat mitzvah. What do you wear? Bring along? Where should you sit? Or your Hindu neighbor has died and you want to express your condolences. What should you do? What would you experience? Is it OK to bring a plate of food next door? What KIND of food??
This interesting book contains chapters about 29 faiths from Buddhist to Hindu to Episcopalian to Pentecostal. Each chapter has a short history of that faith, its main tenets, and its basic worship service. It also lists life cycle events like birth ceremonies, coming of age and marriage ceremonies, and funeral services. It explains each one, what will happen, where one should sit, times, if any, when a guest should NOT enter or leave the worship space, and more information so you will know what to expect, feel more comfortable, and avoid making any faux pas.
Another way to use this book is to read the chapters of the faiths you think are either most similar or most different to Lutheranism. See if you are right! You can also just read those sections which seem most interesting to you. This book can answer questions you have always had about other faiths but never knew anyone you could ask, or if you did know someone of that faith, you did not ask them for fear of embarrassment. ( )

I think this book should be in every house, possibly every school. We may never need some of the sections, but I'd so much rather have it to check than not have it. ( )

A neighbor invites you to a Seder; what should you bring? Your Hindi coworkers are getting married; what's an appropriate wedding present? You're visiting a new church with family; how much should you put in the offering plate? The mosque in your neighborhood is having an open house during Ramadan; is it OK to wear a crucifix?

All these mundane issues related with being a polite and gracious visitor in other people's homes and places of worship are covered in this handy reference book. When my son was very young, my husband and I agreed he could visit any church he liked, as long as I accomanied him. I got this book so that, no matter what kind of church we attend, we are always respectful of the worshippers there. It turned out to be useful for more than that, though, because they do not just explain the standard worship services. Customs for birth initiations (infant baptisms, naming ritutals), coming of age initiations (bar mitzvahs and adult baptism), weddings, funerals, and interments are all presented to help a visitor understand his hosts better.

Various Christian denominations and non-Christian faiths are presented, along with the basic tenets of their faiths (this is NOT intended to be a primer on theology, just a heads-up on what to expect), proper dress code for any kind of service, and an understanding of what constitutes polite in various religions. The authors are sensitive both to the guests and the hosts in their descriptions of everything from marriage customs and wedding ceremonies to whether or not a woman's hem needs to fall below her knees. Concepts about why these customs exist are not presented, so there is no judgment even implied about what is an acceptable custom. It is never suggested that a visitor must do something that is against their religious beliefs. In fact, the authors go so far as to explain what foods may be served and whether or not wine is served at meals and communions so the visitor won't be breaking any of his own doctrinal rules.

This is not intended to be a book read from cover-to-cover, as it repeats itself often. However, it is good to at least skim ahead of time so you are prepared when meeting someone from a new (to you) faith. One note, this books is only interested in organized faiths that are generally opened to outsiders, have large-ish populations, and that have set times and places to meet. They also do not dwell on the differences between sects of Judaism and Islam. Again, they are not explaining the tenets of faith in depth, just the outward polite practices. ( )

http://anotherlibrarian.blogspot.com/2007/09/review-how-to-be-perfect-stranger.h... ( )