John Baggett

I read Finding the Good in Grief, in exchange for honest review from Kregel Blog Tours. I wanted to read this book because at the time, I was thinking about my former miscarriages. I received a paperback version of the book. I never really grieved over anyone close to me dying, except the unknown babies. My great grandma died in May, 2000. Could not grieve. I was two months pregnant with a new job, and my job would not let me off work to attend the funeral. One of the reasons I was moved from a temp to a new hire was because of the pregnancy. My inspector from my former department recommended me because I was pregnant. I was a new hire and had not acquired vacation days yet. She died a few days before orientation. I needed the insurance because it was one of those 100% hospitalization plans. I was divided but my grandma and family was visiting the following week.

My grandma died in 2000 as well. She died on November 8th, the day before Brad was born. I did not find out she died until after I had the baby. I thought she died on 9th for the longest until I saw the obituary years later. I had no time to grieve because I was busy with Brad.

I really felt grief after the second miscarry. The first miscarry didn't cause too much grief. I was in pain. Immeasurable pain for the longest. I did not tell anyone. What took me 5 minutes to walk to the bus stop to get to school at that time, now took me 30 to 40 minutes because of the pain I was in. Everything from the back, legs, and feminine areas was in pain. Not to mention the fibroids was acting up, plus back to back Herpes outbreaks. The second miscarry made me question everything: men, relationships, and sex. This one lead me to celibacy, very slowly

Anyway, back to the book:

Dr.Baggett discussed how he lost his son, not to death, but to schizophrenia. I never thought about grief from that standpoint-losing a child, even a parent, or someone close to mental illness. I noticed my kids had mental disorders early.

The book is a short book, consisting of 5 chapters or steps:

Step 1: Trust God and Rely on Others
Step 2: Choose reality instead of illustion
Step 3: Resist the temptation to get stuck
Step 4: Recognize moments of grace
Step 5: Discover new meaning and purpose

Each step also discusses a few sub-steps of grieving. For example. Step 1 discusses shock, while step 2 discusses denial, escape, and victimization. Step 3 discusses questioning, anger, and depression. Step 4 discusses acceptance. Step 5 discusses calling and affirmation.

I also liked how each chapter ended in discussion questions, with some room to write your answers. This book is great for personal or small group bible study.

To give you an idea of the first chapter, here are some of the things I highlighted:
Grief is universal. Everyone will experience emotional pain.
Grief is a social experience. When something bad happens, it affects more than one person.
Grief is normal. It is not a sign of weakness.
Grief helps emotional and physical healing.
Grief can help us draw closer
Acceptance helps us heal and move on with life.
This was a great read. I highlighted a lot of passages throughout the book.… (meer)

When you lose someone you love – no matter what the circumstances – it takes time to heal. Unfortunately, the process, necessity and importance of grieving are rarely taught or valued in our culture. Because other people are uncomfortable with our pain, they often encourage us to rush through the grieving process.

That’s why surrounding yourself with people who have suffered their own losses – gone through the process – and found healing on the other side is crucial to helping you navigate your way through your own situation. There is much wisdom to be gained from other people’s experiences.

John F. Baggett is one such person. John experienced loss in an unusual way. For 17 years, John was the father of a “gifted and talented young man with a bright and promising future”. Then, within a matter of weeks, everything changed.

Out of the blue, his son Mark began to exhibit inappropriate, incoherent, and violent behavior. At first, John suspected Mark might be on drugs. But soon, John learned that his son was experiencing something worse: the onset of schizophrenia, an incurable brain disease that not only stole Mark’s personality and changed him forever, but also changed John, too.

In Finding The Good In Grief – Rediscover Joy After A Life-Changing Loss, John F. Baggett draws upon his experiences and those of others to write about the journey through grief from a Christian perspective. For the framework of the book, John draws on – and expands upon – the five stages of grief that Dr. Elizabeth Kubler-Ross originally identified many years ago in her classic book, On Death and Dying.

Over the years, I've read a lot of books on death, loss and grief, and can honestly say that Finding The Good In Grief is one of the most sensitive and beautifully written books I've come across. There are a number of things that I loved about this book, including:

• The incorporation of the author’s personal story into the book
• The inclusion of Scripture throughout the book
• The questions at the end of each chapter that move the reader towards healing

If you have suffered any kind of loss or lived through any type of tragedy, I cannot recommend Finding The Good In Grief by John F. Baggett highly enough for your healing journey.

This review was written by and originally published at Create With Joy.

Disclosure: I received a copy of this book from the publisher for review purposes. I was not compensated or required to write a positive review. The opinions expressed in this review are entirely my own.… (meer)