Debra FineBesprekingen

Great information

This is a really great and actionable book. The author gives a ton of really useful advice for all situations.

I couldn't finish this at the first time of reading. Finally finished it this time around. Debra has some great tips but there are some that I find are quite unusable.

Buen libro para ayudar en cierta medida a iniciar conversaciones a los más reservados. Te da ejemplos para que puedas usar. No descarto leer más de la autora.

If others are comfortable in our presence, they will feel good about doing business with us.

Buyers choices of where to spend money are influenced by the presence or absence of rapport.

Shyness could be mistaken for arrogance.

So what has a typical day been for you lately?

When asking for someone’s name put an emphasis on the word name to say no to the other person that they are important.

When seated at a large table, introduce newcomers to everyone you’re sitting with to position yourself as a leader in the group.

Using peoples names will make them feel special.

Nonverbal components of a conversation account for 65% of a a conversation effectively.

When an awkward pause occurs ask for advice even if you don’t need it. Ie. Which bank do you use I’m thinking about switching, dentist etc,

History questions
Interview questions

A good complement acknowledges the object of admiration. A top-of-the-line complement goes beyond that to give conversation material by expounding on why you like the item. For instance, you might elaborate on the sweater by saying I love your sweater, that shade really enhances the color of your eyes.

F.O.R.M.
Acronym for remembering topics of conversation. Family, occupation, recreation, miscellaneous

It’s OK at times to share added information about yourself to provide ammo for the next persons question.

Most people don’t want advice, they want empathy and compassion.

End each conversation with a compliment

Ending question:
I hope we can do business together soon. May I call you in the coming days to determine your level of interest?½

Some useful advice, but a bit dated, unless you attend weekly luncheons.

As many other reviewers have noted, this a so-so book with a reasonable amount of good advice -- so pretty decent for a self help book.

Fine's key insight is that small talk serves an important purpose. It's not just mindless dribble that people who can't handle real conversations use to pass the time. It can be the tool that builds the rapport and trust that allows deep conversation to happen.

Fine's key tip is that the key to making good small talk is to get the other person to talk. People like to talk about themselves, and when you give them the opportunity to do so, they think you're a good conversationalist! The way to do this is to ask open ended questions, and then give the speaker the gift of sincerely listening. Not only will this listening be noticed and make the other person help continue the conversation, it will also allow you to pick up on useful tidbits that can be used to move the conversation further forward.

For these two ideas, the book was worth reading.

It's an okay book. Unless you are totally inept at social or business occasions with almost no clue of what to talk about, then this book is not going to be of much help. There are a few good ideas in the book that come up during the early portions of it. But otherwise, it's mostly a list of things to do and not to do supported by tons of anecdotal stories.

You'll not be disappointed too much if you read quickly.

Avec beaucoup d'humour, ce livre vous met toutes les cartes en main pour vous sortir brillamment de n'importe quelle situation. Réussir un entretien d'embauche, animer une réunion, ou encore prendre congé d'un rabat-joie dans un cocktail? bientôt un jeu d'enfant |

mostly obvious suggestions. There is little "fine art" in it.

Pretty helpful, easy to read, and non-pretentious sort of advice/writing (don't you hate those?).

Unfortunately I can't say whether it 100% helped since I have yet to incorporate the lessons in the book into my life (reading it 2 days ago so that's maybe why).