Kevin Kalu

I want to start off by saying that I am so excited to see scifi/fantasy books by and featuring people of color. They're very unfortunately harder to find, so when I can get my hands on one, I get very invested and very interested. That being said, I'm sorry to say that this wasn't what I was hoping it would be. Don't get me wrong, the concept is very interesting to me: a battle between magicians and regular humans, persecution and insurrection and fighting for one's beliefs. That's right up my alley plot-wise, but for me, it was very difficult to get past the style of writing. Everything felt like it moved too fast and the characters seemed to be archetypes that leaned too much into their roles. The writing needs to be streamlined and smoother, and there needs to be time taken - especially in the beginning - to establish the people we need to care about as audiences and connecting with the pasts of these characters in a meaningful way. My advice would be to get an editor to go through with a fine-toothed comb so that any over-exaggeration, plot holes, and grammar mistakes can be remedied and the story can expand even more than it is. I very much want this book to succeed since I think a lot of very good and important things can be addressed about the world that we live in. As of right now, though, it just doesn't feel complete.… (meer)