Craig A. Steffen

A Family Apart - Sleuthing the Mysteries of Abandonment, Adoption, and DNA - A Memoir by Craig A. Steffen is an incredible book. Although published six years ago when personal DNA research was in its infancy, it is a must read for genealogists and especially those who are trying to solve mysteries around adoption. Steffen tells the story of his less than ideal childhood in a nuanced manner, seeking to understand the various adults in his life rather than trying to blame them. He is tenacious in his search for his birth family and uses all the tools of good research and DNA available at the time. The book is available on the Member's Loan Shelf - check it out.… (meer)

Note: Although I won this title through the LibraryThing Early Reviewers program, I never received the book. I obtained a copy elsewhere for this review.

Craig Steffen always knew that he was adopted. He had fragmentary memories of the children's home where he had lived with his older siblings Theresa and Ricky after they had been abandoned by their parents. He remembers the day Morris and Flora Steffen took him and his sister to their farm, leaving his brother behind. When he was ten years old he overheard his mother telling a relative that after they adopted their older son they wanted to adopt a daughter. They chose Theresa but had to take her brother Craig too even though they did not want another son.

The Steffens were devout members of the Plymouth Brethren church and young Craig soon fell afoul of their many rules. (Who knew making faces at other children in the pews is frowned upon?) Due to the family's frequent moves, he attended seven different schools. He was often bullied and got in trouble both at school when he fought back against his tormentors and at home.

Only after both his adoptive parents die does Steffen seek to answer some of the questions that haunt him: Why? Why did his biological parents abandon their three children? Why didn't any relatives offer to take the children in? What happened to his mother, father and brother Ricky? Like a persistent gumshoe Steffen tracks down leads, interviews anyone who may have known his family, encounters dead ends and finally uses DNA testing to discover who he is.

This is a very personal memoir and the writing reflects Steffen's authentic voice. Many of the paragraphs in the early chapters are only a sentence long as if he is recording memories as they occur to him. Black and white photographs help bring the text to life.

[Not received through LibraryThing Early Reviewers]… (meer)

Craig Steffen�Ûªs memoir ‰ÛÓ A Family Apart ‰ÛÓ is truly one of those reads where I say ‰ÛÏyou can‰Ûªt believe this is non-fiction.‰Û Steffen‰Ûªs unfolding of his life beginning with ‰ÛÏthe disappearance‰Û of his mother and her abandonment of three children left with a father unwilling to care and taken to an orphanage. Steffen and his sister are adopted as very young children and their brother is left behind‰Û_.so much mystery and unanswered questions. The reader is drawn in immediately by the writing style which allows you to truly identify with his life ‰ÛÓ in a story-telling fashion ‰ÛÓ it is a page-turner that you cannot put down. Interspersed with coveted family pictures of biological and adopted family members the level of detail is simply remarkable. The incomprehensible turns, twists, fate and murder leave you weeping and rejoicing right along side the author. I have not read a memoir this compelling and beautifully written since The Castle and I actually prefer Steffen‰Ûªs self-reflecting journey which leads him to the awakening of his life with forgiveness, understanding and love. Everyone will benefit from reading his story and adopted families will identify and learn from Steffen‰Ûªs relentless journey to find his DNA parents. It is incredible that even today adopted records are covered pages with names taped over them ‰ÛÓ covered and sealed. Steffen gives hope and courage to not give up. I will recommend this read and give to several friends this holiday season as a memoir that will get everyone talking.… (meer)

This is a compelling and down-to-earth story of a man who had been abandoned, along with his older sister and brother, by his family at the tender age of 2 years and his search for the truth of his beginnings. His mother stole the family car and disappeared. His overwhelmed father took the three children to an orphanage. The author and his sister were adopted by the Steffens, but his brother was left behind.

The author’s telling of his journey of discovery is a fascinating one. You’ll read about his life as a child growing up in his adopted home with his strict, unemotional parents. His solving of his mother’s mysterious disappearance reads like a true crime novel. And his search and use of DNA testing to find his biological father is nothing short of a miracle. The author has given us a unique look at what living with a family other than your own is like and all the little – and big – things missing from that life that others take for granted.

I was given a copy of this book by the publicist in return for an honest review.… (meer)