Alan D. Wolfelt

In this short book, the author offers 100 suggestions to help you deal with the loss of a spouse. What I liked about the book is that the suggestions are practical and concise; they are doable. I also like the way the author recognizes that everyone is unique and affirms that you must grieve and mourn, and it's okay to do it your way. Also, the book is inclusive of same-sex relationships, which I find comforting even though I am a cis gendered heterosexual person.

My husband died suddenly and unexpectedly. For me, this was a book I could only read in small doses at this time and it is written to enable you to dip in and out and take what you need when you are ready for it.… (meer)

This tiny book contains few words but lots of ideas- well, eleven of them to be exact. It’s an outline of how best to be with a person who is morning, as a companion who lets the person grieve rather than trying to cheer them up or distract them. Listen. Respect their pain. Allow that grief is not linear, and that it is messy and disorderly. Be curious about the mourner and what they are going through-you can learn from them. Simple ideas, but powerful ones, laid out neatly so (if you’re lucky) you can remember them when the time comes. (This is not to say that distraction or cheering up is wrong; those have an important place, too. But that’s for others-the mourner’s friends and family, or, if you are friend or family rather than volunteer companion, for a different time) It’s short, but it took me an oddly long time to read, because I had to stop after each chapter and think about what the author was saying.… (meer)