Language! Vampires! (but it was in Des Moines)
Nice concept in that "be careful what you wish for" and Unicorns are cute and everything but....other than that it was one of those teen books that just didn't really hit the mark for me. It had some cute stuff but by the end of it you hated everyone and didn't really care anymore plus the whole "I suppose you've read my book" thing didn't make sense most of the time. ( )

I really loved Adam Selzer's EXTRAORDINARY*: *THE TRUE STORY OF MY FAIRY GODPARENT, WHO ALMOST KILLED ME, AND CERTAINLY NEVER MADE ME A PRINCESS. I mean, check that out. The title enough should already have you sucked in. But in case you need a little something to sweeten the pot, I'll have you know this: EXTRAORDINARY* is the best book I've ever read that uses unicorn poop as a major plot point. (Okay, maybe the only book. But, you know.)

Set in the familiar Selzerverse town of Cornersville Trace, Iowa, EXTRAORDINARY* is the story of one Jennifer Van Der Berg, a girl who is living a pretty average life, doing the whole high school thing in the wake of zombies and vampires "coming out of the coffin." She goes to class, has a few friends, and goes to regular Post-human/Human Alliance meetings. And she really loves purple. But when one day at McDonald's some greasy jerk deigns it appropriate to call her Grimace -- yes, the giant purple dude occasionally seen in McD's advertising -- she has half a mind to rip his face off. (Jennifer Van Der Berg has some anger issues to work out.) Soon, this guy -- Gregory Grue -- is everywhere, including her Alliance meetings, where he claims to be a new type of post human. In fact, he's Jennifer's fairy god mofo.

Of course, readers should already know this, as Jennifer explains. Her story has already been told in a bestselling book, and, ever since the movie adaptation came out, people have been camping out on her lawn and harassing her boyfriend. But the book -- written by post-human "expert" Eileen Codlin -- got it all wrong. In the book, "Jenny V." got to go to the dance, avoid a geek, and kiss a vampire to become a princess. Real life is way harder than that.

In real life, Jennifer kind of likes the geek, whom she hasn't seen since a spelling bee scandal in elementary school. And the only reason she mightkiss that vampire is the fact that her fairy god mofo -- who also has managed to become her theatre teacher, of all things -- is one tricky, er, mofo.

While there are definitely some treats in EXTRAORDINARY* for folks who read Adam Selzer's last book, I KISSED A ZOMBIE AND I LIKED IT, you certainly don't have to read one to enjoy the other. EXTRAORDINARY* is clever, snarky, and packed with laughs. And, well, unicorn poop. But, you know, I think readers should focus on the laughs. (Poop is funny, after all, isn't it? ( )