Crazymamie's 75 in 2012 (Page 7)

Feeling Lucky, Ducky?

Currently Reading


July
68. Farewell Summer by Ray Bradbury (4.25 stars)
69. The Cold Dish by Craig Johnson (4.5 stars)
70. Something Wicked This Way Comes by Ray Bradbury (4.75 stars)
71. The Absolutely True Diary of a Part-Time Indian by Sherman Alexie (4.5 stars)
72. A Kiss Before Dying by Ira Levine (4 stars)

January
1. The Sense of an Ending - Julian Barnes (4 stars)
2. Daughter of Smoke and Bone - Laini Taylor (4 stars)
3. 11/22/63 - Stephen King (5 stars)
4. A Drink Before the War - Dennis Lehane (4 stars)
5. Ender's Game - Orson Scott Card (4 stars)
6. Cannery Row - John Steinbeck (4.5 stars)

February
7. The Fellowship of the Ring - J.R.R. Tolkien (5 stars)
8. The Old Man and the Sea - Ernest Hemingway (audiobook) (4 stars)
9. The Woman in Black - Susan Hill (4.5 stars)
10. City of Bones - Michael Connelly (4 stars)
11. Behind the Beautiful Forevers - Katherine Boo (4.5 stars)
12. Mockingbird - Kathryn Erskine (5 stars)
13. The Wayward Bus - John Steinbeck (4 stars)
14. Pronto - Elmore Leonard (4 stars)
15. The Snow Child - Eowyn Ivey (4 stars)
16. Riding the Rap - Elmore Leonard (3.5 stars)
17. The Two Towers - J. R. R. Tolkien (5 stars)
18. Once There was a War - John Steinbeck (4.5 stars)
19. The Coroner's Lunch - Colin Cotterill (4 stars)
20. Below Stairs - Margaret Powell (3.5 stars)
21. 84, Charing Cross Road - Helene Hanff (5 stars)

March
22. Blood Red Road - Moira Young (4 stars)
23. The Eyre Affair - Jasper Fforde (3.5 stars)
24. Thirty-Three Teeth - Colin Cotterill (4 stars)
25. King Soloman's Mines - Henry Rider Haggard (4 stars)
26. Still Life - Louise Penny (4 stars)
27. By the Iowa Sea - Joe Blair (4 stars)
28. A Share in Death - Deborah Crombie (3.5 stars)
29. A Severed Head - Iris Murdoch (4 stars)
30. The Return of the King - J. R. R. Tolkien (5 stars)
31. The Winter of Our Discontent - John Steinbeck (4 stars)
32. Don't Look Back - Karin Fossum (3.5 stars)
33. I Capture the Castle - Dodie Smith (4.25 stars)
34. Disco for the Departed - Colin Cotterill (3.5 stars)

April
35. The Moon is Down - John Steinbeck (4 stars)
36. The Sweetness at the Bottom of the Pie - Alan Bradley (audiobook) (4 stars)
37. Things Fall Apart - Chinua Achebe (4.5 stars)
38. The Wolves of Willoughby Chase - Joan Aiken (4 stars)
39. Blacklands - Belinda Bauer (4 stars)
40. Chess Story - Stefan Zweig (4.5 stars)
41. Sea of Poppies - Amitav Ghosh (4.25 stars)
42. Julie of the Wolves - Jean Craighead George (3.5 stars)
43. All Shall Be Well - Deborah Crombie (4 stars)
44. The Fault in Our Stars - John Green (4.5 stars)
45. Rules - Cynthia Lord (4 stars)
46. Darkness, Take My Hand - Dennis Lehane (4 stars)
47. The Shape of Water - Andrea Camilleri (4 stars)
48. Cinder - Melissa Meyer (4 stars)
49. Binocular Vision - Edith Pearlman (4.5 stars)
50. The Wrestling Match - Buchi Emecheta (2.5 stars)

May
51. The Redeemer - Jo Nesbo (4.5 stars)
52. Casino Royale - Ian Fleming (3.5 stars)
53. If Death Ever Slept - Rex Stout (4 stars)
54. Persuasion - Jane Austen (4.5 stars)
55. Lost Light - Michael Connelly (4 stars)
56. The Devil in the White City by Erik Larson (4.5 stars)

JUNE
57. In the Heat of the Night by John Ball (4 stars)
58. Of Mice and Men by John Steinbeck (4.5 stars)
59. The Time Machine by H. G. Wells (4 stars)
60. Dandelion Wine by Ray Bradbury (5 stars)
61. Balzac and the Little Chinese Seamstress by Dai Sijie (4 stars)
62. Wolf Hall by Hilary Mantel (4.5 stars)
63. Anarchy and Old Dogs by Colin Cotterill (4.5 stars)
64. The Uncommon Reader by Alan Bennett (4 stars)
65. Interpreter of Maladies by Jhumpa Lahiri (4.5 stars)
66. Train Dreams by Denis Johnson (4 stars)
67. The Worst Hard Time by Timothy Egan (4.25stars)

An idea stolen from Heather (souloftherose), who borrowed it from Liz (lyzard): ongoing series that I am actively reading. This doesn't include series where I have the first book in my TBR pile (i.e. series I haven't started reading yet aren't included). An asterisk indicates a series where I already have a copy of the next book.

1. *African Trilogy by Chinua Achebe: Next Up: No Longer at Ease (2/3)

2. *Charley Davidson by Darynda Jones: Next Up: Third Grave Dead Ahead (3/3)

3. Chief Inspector Armand Gamache by Louise Penny: Next Up: A Fatal Grace (2/8)

4. *Commissario Montalbano by Andrea Camilleri: Next Up: The Terra- Cotta Dog (2/14)

5. Daughter of Smoke and Bone by Laini Taylor: Next Up: Days of Blood and Starlight (2/3)

6. *Divergent by Veronica Roth: Next Up: Insurgent (2/3)

7. *Dr. Siri Paiboun by Colin Cotterill: Next up: Curse of the Pogo Stick (5/8)

8. Duncan Kincaid/ Gemma James by Deborah Crombie:Next Up: Leave the Grass Green (3/14)

9. Dust Lands by Moira Young: Next Up: Rebel Heart (2/3)

10. The Forest of Hands and Teeth by Carrie Ryan: Next Up: The Dead tossed Waves (2/3)

11. *Green Town by Ray Bradbury: Next Up: Something Wicked This Way Comes (3/3) COMPLETED

12. *Harry Bosch by Michael Connelly: Next Up: The Narrows (10/18)

13. *Harry Hole by Jo Nesbo: Next Up: The Snowman (7/9)

14. *The Ibis Trilogy by Amitav Ghosh: Next Up: River of Smoke (2/3)

15. *Inspector Sejer by Karin Fossum: Next Up: He Who Fears the Wolf (2/9)

16. *James Bond by Ian Fleming: Next Up: Live and Let Die (2/14)

17. *Kenzie and Gennaro by Dennis Lehane: Next Up: Sacred (3/6)

18. *Lady Julia Gray by Deanna Raybourn: Next Up: The Dark Enquiry (5/5)

19. *Matched by Ally Condie: Next Up: Crossed (2/3)

20. *Millenium Trilogy by Steig Larrson: Next Up: The Girl Who Kicked the Hornets Nest (3/3)

21. *Philip Marlowe by Raymond Chandler: Next Up: The Little Sister (5/8)

22. Raylan Givens by Elmore Leonard: Next Up: Raylan (3/3)

23. *Sookie Stackhouse by Charlaine Harris: Next Up: Dead in the Family (9/12)

24.Temperance Brennan by Kathy Reichs: Next Up: Grave Secrets (5/15)

25. Vish Puri by Tarquin Hall: Next Up: The Case of the Man Who Died Laughing (2/3)

26. Walt Longmire by Craig Johnson: Up Next: Death Without Company (2/8)

27. *Wine Country Mysteries by Ellen Crosby: Next Up: The Chardonnay Charade (2/6)

28. *Wolf Hall Trilogy by Hilary Mantel: Next up: Bring Up the Bodies (2/3)

JULY HOPEFULS

Group Reads
River of Smoke by Amitav Ghosh (#1/shared read)
Something Wicked This Way Comes by Ray Bradbury (#9/shared read) COMPLETED
Half of a Yellow Sun by Chimamanda Adichie (#11/shared read)
East of Eden by John Steinbeck (#7/shared read)
Truman by David McCullough

TIOLI Candidates
Bring Up the Bodies by Hilary Mantel (#9)
The Cold Dish by Craig Johnson (#10) COMPLETED
The Iliad by Homer (#9)
Unaccustomed Earth by Jhumpa Lahiri (#13)
Curse of the Pogo Stick by Colin Cotterill (#8)
Farewell Summer by Ray Bradbury (#15) COMPLETED
The Last Werewolf by Glen Duncan (#10)
Gone Girl by Gillian Flynn (#17)

ETC.
Parnassus on Wheels by Christopher Morley
War Horse by Michael Morpurgo
Ready Player One by Earnest Cline

Hey, Wait a Minute...This Wasn't on the List
A Kiss Before Dying by Ira Levin COMPLETED
The Absolutely True Diary of a Part-Time Indian by Sherman Alexie (#6) COMPLETED

Simmering on the Back Burner - Books Begun but not Yet Done
Cup of Gold - John Steinbeck (#23)

Abandoned
Death Comes to Pemberly by P. D. James
David Copperfield - Charles Dickens
Lady Sings the Blues - Billie Holiday

This is where I will keep track of the ten books I read from my shelves before purchasing any additional books. I will also list the books that I resisted buying- just for fun.

Ellen's Read Ten Before You Buy Anymore:
1. Farewell Summer by Ray Bradbury
2. The Cold Dish by Craig Johnson
3. Something Wicked This Way Comes by Ray Bradbury
4. A Kiss Before Dying by Ira Levine
5.
6.
7.
8.
9.
10.

Books That I Resisited Buying:
1. Death Without Company by Craig Johnson - I am so snagging this as soon as I read my ten books that I already own!
2. The Guards by Ken Bruen - recommended by Mark
3. Blood Ties by Pamela Freeman - recommended by Lucy
4. The Ox Bow Incident by Walter van Tilburg Clark - recommended by Judy
5.

I think I'm first on a thread! That's never happened before.

Rhian! Welcome, and yes, you're first!!

I'm here so early. Like the series list! Yours looks a lot more sensible than mine, pared down to the essentials.

I love the adorable photo on your thread.

What a great idea .. I love the series list, Mamie. Hmm... I wonder if I could be quite as organized. I'm only starting to read some series in order. I read most of mine rather haphazardly. But if I kept a list, it would at least help me be more organized. *goes off to think of starting a series list on Excel*

Lucy - Welcome aboard! I like that you numbered your series - I might copy that.

Caro - Good to see you! The series list is keeping me moving on the series that I really want to follow. Before I kept forgetting where I was at in a series. This way everything is at my fingertips and easy to update as I go.

Wow, you started a new thread! I'm sorry but I have to say it: Go Mamie, Go Mamie! You are a true up & comer!
A very ugly storm rolled through earlier but nothing much happened, just a little rain. It has cooled off a little. Yah!
Stop by my thread. I thought Paul would take the bait but he didn't. Favorite Audrey Hepburn film?

Mark! We got that same storm with the same results. Yah! Nothing else fell down in the yard. Yippee Skippy to that! I'll come over - Are we supposed to list our favorite Audrey Hepburn film or guess yours?

Good grief! You have been a crazy busy Mamie. Yesterday sounds like it was a busy day to start but
one that ended Very Nicely! good! Those close moments with one of the kids at a time is special.

Actually, I was kidding around about the Hepburn films, although we haven't discussed any films in quite awhile...

Mamie, I read through a plethora of messages on your old thread only to discover that I could have begun afresh on your lovely new thread. But then I would have missed some excellent reviews, and even a few recipes. I'm glad the house is getting back in ship-shape so quickly, although it probably seemed like a long time to you. I'll try my best to keep up with you this month. Stay cool!

So true, Kath! I am soaking them up, as they keep insisting on getting older each year. What a fun ride we have had!

Speaking of fun, and in direct relation to the photo at the top of the thread which is of my own Dear Abby, I have a funny story to share. When the kids were little - probably about the time of that photo - Craig and I awoke one morning to the sound of the toilet flushing. And then flushing again. And again. It suddenly dawned on us that we should not be hearing that toilet flush so often, so we got out of bed to investigate. Here's what we found: Dan and Abby standing in the bathroom taking turns flushing things down the toilet, and they were being so polite about it, too. As we approached we heard Dan say, "Now your turn, Abby." Then another flush just as we popped our heads into the doorway. The toilet was packed with Barbie shoes, Hot Wheels cars, GI Joes (the little green ones), dominoes - you name it and it was in there. They were fascinated because as they flushed all the toys swirled around in a dizzying dance, and the water rose all the way to the top of the tank, almost, but not quite rising over the edge. "Look, Mom, isn't this cool?" They proceeded to explain how at first whatever they dropped into the toilet was flushed right down and the water didn't rise up at all, but now look! I'm looking all right. We had this giant pedestal sink in that bathroom - it had one of those huge basins that is really more decorative than functional. By the time we had removed everything that we could see form the toilet, that sink was completely full of toys. The toilet still wouldn't flush properly - Craig worked with it for a while, but finally had to admit defeat. I called the Roto Rooter Man. He came out and worked for quite a long time before calling me to say that he thought that he had located the source of the problem. He had one of those long metal sticks with the stabby thing (pretty sure that is the correct technical term) on the end to it, and stabbed onto the end of it was...wait for it...a giant rubber ducky! I have no idea how that thing actually made it down the toilet - but there stood the Roto Rooter Man with his royal scepter topped with our majestic rubber ducky. I so wish I had taken a photo of that. I did keep the bill, which was $75.00, because it said the charge was for "rubber duck removal from commode"

That's so true, Mark. I think Breakfast at Tiffany's is my favorite. What's yours?

Hi, Donna! Decided to start fresh since it was a new month. And I thought the repairs went so quickly, although, as I said over on Kath's thread, we hit a slight snag. Something was wrong with the ceiling paint, so the painter couldn't use it - he can't come back to do the job until Tuesday. So, by Wednesday we should be good to go.

OMG... LOL I hope it was at least a little funny then, because it is hilarious now...
Kids can give us a wild ride.. and thank the goddess for them!

On a side note, you know the rubber ducky? When I was working with preschoolers
at my last job... a boy in a different room loved a plastic duckie. It was just like the rubber duckies.. but slightly larger and hard plastic. He somehow managed to get the entire thing into his mouth.. but then, it wouldn't come out. In the years that I worked there, it was the only time they called housekeeping and maintenance along with the nurse. Maintenance got it out with a largest of pliers.. which he used to crack it gently into pieces. In a move that was an exception to the rule there, the teacher ( who is a mom and has a huge sense of humor) did tell the boys mom. No one was harmed in the removal of the duck..er..except for the duck....

OMG! That ducky story is priceless! I can just see both of the kids standing there taking turns flushing the toilet. Hey, 75 bucks was worth that memory.

Hmmmmm...I might have to go with Love in the Afternoon, with Roman Holiday a close second. It's been many years since I've seen these films. Actually, The Nun's Story is pretty darn good too!

Kath -We laughed at the time, trust me! They didn't get into trouble; all we said is don't do it again because it's not good for the toilet. And they never did it again. Your story is too funny! Glad they got it out without too much trouble. I wonder how he got it in there in the first place!

Mark- It is one of my favorite memories. And Audrey - I think everything she was in is good- I just adore her. I read somewhere (maybe in Jennifer Grant's book about her father) that Cary Grant wanted her to play opposite him in Father Goose, but she was committed to some other project and so they used Leslie Carron (think I didn't spell that correctly). Anyway, I would have loved to see her playing that role opposite Cary Grant. She would have been perfect for that part!

Oh Mamie, you had me laughing at your rubber ducky story! And then Kath finished me off with the plastic duck story. I was pleased to learn that I remembered all the words to the Sesame Street Rubber Ducky song. Haley thinks her Grandma is a nut, but it made for an interesting bath experience when she was here.

Donna, I LOVE that Rubber Ducky song - we used to sing it to the kids during bath time, too!! Nut=Fun to be with.

Mamie - time flies over here. I go to sleep for a while and you are up and sprinting on another thread. Congrats.

18> Okay, that is the best toilet story ever! Love it, love it, love it. I, too, have the rubber ducky song in my head now.

I've been watching the news about the terrible storms, power outages, and heat wave in your neck of the woods. Yikes! I'm glad your power is back on and that everyone is safe. Stay cool, Mamie. Take things slowly.....

#18 Oh Mamie, I love the toilet story :-D Your children sound delightful even when they're unintentionally causing chaos.

"rubber duck removal from commode" - what a great story, I love it!

I read up on your old thread and I agree that maybe it was 'for the best' (if that can be said at all) that the tree fell when it fell. We are just having a heavy thunderstorm here while I am writing, but nothing that could compare with the extreme storms you've been describing.
I hope that July will be much less adventurous than June was and that you'll somehow get some relax time!

What an ambitious list of "July Hopefuls"!

Good morning to you! What's going on today in your world?

TWO great stories in one visit. Thank you both! I read them aloud to the spousal unit. Mostly he thinks I'm daft in my love of LT but today he was a bit envious.

Paul - Thanks. I'm just trying to keep you on your toes!

Ellen - Glad you liked the story! We have gotten more rain, which we desperately needed, but luckily no more high winds or power outages.

Heather - Children make their own magic, don't they? And we have had a lot of chaos over the years - next time I'll tell you the Chex Mix story!

Nathalie - I really try never to question life events. I feel extremely lucky to be living the life that I have, and I know that every moment is a gift. Just trying to soak it up and in return do no harm. When I am gone I hope that my kids will be able to look back and remember me with humor and know that I loved being their Mom. Whatever they question in life, whatever they choose for themselves, I hope they embrace the journey.

And my July list is a bit ambitious - I know I won't get to all of them, but it sure will be fun trying.

Morning Kath - Today the contractor is coming with all of the paperwork for the repairs and the bill - YIKES! The insurance company already mailed us a check for repairs but it is made out to Craig and I and the bank. So, I will need the paperwork showing that the repairs have been completed for the bank's endorsement - and they might have to send out their own inspector. Then I guess I will have to mail it to Craig to endorse, unless the bank has a better idea.

Morning Lucy! You posted while I was writing my post. Glad you liked our stories!

I have a better idea.. Sign Craig's name .
I do it all the time.. I have even done it in front of a teller.. but sign his at home, then....

Morning Mamie! Your response (#31) to Nathalie choked me up - in a good way. With your permission, I am adopting it for my Life Credo. You captured my thoughts in a succinct and beautifully expressed manner. Thank you!

Kath - Hmm..

Donna - I'm touched. Adopt away!

Happy New Thread Mamie!What a lovely girl you've got up there. How old would dear Abby be now?

Oh dear... what an amazing story about the kids flushing down all those those toys down the toilet! :-) And "He had one of those long metal sticks with the stabby thing (pretty sure that is the correct technical term)" is exactly the kind of thing I would say!

I agree that is an ambitious reading list, but making the lists is half the fun isn't it? I'd love to say I'll join you for Half a Yellow Sun since it had been on my WL forever and now has been on my shelves even longer... but it's not going to happen this month which will be taken up with Wolf Hall, which I'm reading at a snail's pace and then East of Eden, which will probably take up the entire month. But hey... I can always put it on the list just for the heck of it, right? ;-)

Hi Ilana! Abby is now 16 years old. You and she would have a lot to talk about because she LOVES art - always has. When she was little, she carried a magna doodle around with her everywhere because she was constantly drawing. Now she carries a sketch pad. She makes jewelry, creates fabulous works of art with baked goods, and spends all of her free time either reading or working on her art.

And that's just exactly it about the reading lists - making it is half the fun! Hope you are having a wonderful day.

LOVE the duckie stories!! Thanks for making my morning. Also, I love your read 10 off the shelves list as well as the Ones I Resisted!! : )

Love the Abby stories!

HI Mamie! Love the ducky picture and story! Your kids sound pretty cute!

Lovely new thread, Mamie! And I love the duck in the drain story!

Kim - Thanks! Guess which list will fill up faster?!

Lynda - How are you? SO lovely to see you here. I will pop over to your thread to see if you are back from Florida.

Chelle - How was the camping trip? Glad to see another duck lover!

Terri - Thanks! I really wish I had taken a picture of the Roto Rooter man with the duck stabbed neatly onto the end of his whatever that was he was holding.

Love the story of the kids and the toilet - oh the joys of juvenile discovery!
I remember growing up that Christmas Eve was the most important night of the year and Peter and I (my twin) could never get enough sleep and still woke up in the early hours. One early Christmas morning we got up and sneaked into the front room to see that a huge Fort had been delivered complete with toy soldiers and native american in abundance. We flew straight into a battle of epic proportions which resulted in the fort being decimated before 7 O'clock am. My father was rightly furious in the clear light of day and not impressed by my opinion that maybe Santa had dropped it down the chimney as he was late making all his deliveries.

Oh Paul, that makes me laugh! My sister, Nora, and I used to fall asleep with our eyes glued to the crack under the bedroom door. My Mom wouldn't put any gifts under the tree until after we were in bed on Christmas Eve (um...not because of Santa....my Mom is anti-Santa). So we would try to catch a glimpse of her stashing the loot under the tree, but we never could keep awake quite long enough. Mom must have had a sixth sense about that.

Mom is anti Santa?
you sure do not seem like a kid who came from an anti santi mom :)
you are more like.. an elf.
I mean that in the best possible way :)

LOL! Yep - anti-Santa, anti-Easter Bunny, anti-fun. She is...difficult. She was always generous with gifts because she grew up so poor and had literally nothing. But she is not generous with sharing herself. She is mean-spirited and hurtful, and I keep a healthy distance between us. I used to really try to include her in our lives, but the effort is wasted because she is just not interested. I used to agonize over this until I learned to just let it go. We haven't spoken in years, but there is no anger, no bitterness there - just acceptance of the fact that we do not have a relationship.

I'm more like an elf? That is the sweetest thing! Thank you, Kath!

Your relationship with your mother sounds similar to my relationship with my sister. I find most people don't understand it - that, as you say, there is no anger or bitterness (anymore), just acceptance that it is what it is.

Yep - it's actually much healthier than trying to maintain a broken relationship that is draining on both parties. And my Mom doesn't come to any get togethers. Even before my Dad died, years before he died actually, she stopped coming to Christmas and Thanksgiving because she said she had raised her family and was done with all that. My Dad was blind, so that meant that one of us had to go pick him up so that he could come because she wouldn't give him a ride. I don't understand her, but I don't have to because she gets to make her own choices. I do know that she had a really difficult childhood, and that her Mom wasn't a piece of cake either. I think that we all have to decide for ourselves what is healthy and what is toxic, and then make our own decisions about how we will deal with those things that are toxic. For me that meant gently severing the relationship. You know how when you step back from things, it changes your perspective, and you can see things in a different light. With time and distance, I can now see her more clearly, and I can honestly say that we have nothing in common but blood and some memories - but it doesn't hurt; it just is what it is. If I hadn't stepped back, I think it would have changed who I am, and would have contaminated my thought processes.

Crazy--SO glad you had the strength and wisdom to step back. You are the BEST!

I cannot imagine how you have such a positive outlook on your relationship with your mom. I can't even fathom it. It doesn't seem possible that she wouldn't appreciate grandchildren at least. I can't wait to have grandchildren. But I have a wonderful relationship with both of my kids but especially my daughter. It's good that you can just write her off I guess because the relationship appears to have nowhere to go Mamie. Sad but I'm gLad you have accepted it and moved on.

Loving the story about the rubber duck in the toilet especially the detail about your children being so polite about taking turns flushing!

Relating to the having grown up with a difficult mother. I've recently been reading up on nacissistic mothers and suddenly certain aspects of my childhood are making sense for the first time.

Morning Mamie- Once again I admire your positive outlook. I wish more people shared your sunny attitude. Keep cool! That's my mantra.

I am so sorry. I understand I think....my childhood had its good times..great times!
They were pretty much all when I was out of the house with my grandmother.

So .. did you pick up MacKeeper?

>48 Crazymamie: - I'm going to print this post onto little cards and hand them out when people tell me I'm missing out on a relationship with my sister and I should reach out to her and doesn't it make me sad, etc. I'm glad to know I'm not the only one with this perspective; I have in the past sometimes felt like a terrible person for the choice I made with respect to our "relationship"!

And enough heavy stuff...

Have a great day, Mamie!!

Morning Kim - Thanks! It really took me years to be able to just step away - didn't happen until after I had Abby. The relationship was just so draining, and I felt like it was keeping me from being the kind of Mom that I wanted to be. I just didn't like how she made me feel about myself - as if I were lacking some essential component.

Bonnie - She is really not interested in the grandchildren. She has sixteen of them ranging in age from 33 to 13, but she just wants to do her own thing and not be bothered. She was not that invested in my own childhood, either. My sister Julie is who got me up and dressed in the morning; she did my hair and gave me my baths. My Mom attended school events while I was in elementary school, but I was on my own after that. She and my Dad attended my high school graduation and my college graduation but none of the events in between - no concerts, no marching band competitions, no honor society dinners, and on senior night it was my sister and her husband who stood up in place of my parents. It's hard to explain - I always kind of felt like maybe she had children because that's what people did back then. They got married and had children, and so that's what she did. I don't think she ever dreamed big dreams for herself, and maybe over the years that has made her bitter. I don't know. What I do know is that she gets to make her own choices, and I don't get to judge her for that. But I do get to say that I want to be a different type of Mom to my children, and so everyday I get up and I try to do that.

Dee - That ducky story always makes me laugh, and their little faces when Craig and I stuck our heads in the door. They looked up and grinned, so excited like "wait til you see what we discovered"!

I have better perspective since stepping away from my mother, and now I can try to see things through her eyes and try to understand her choices without it feeling as if I'm opening an old wound.

Mark - Thanks! You keep cool - you're the one out walking in the heat. I worry about you, so keep hydrated and no sprinting!

Kath - I had good times...great times in my childhood. I just never had a close relationship with my Mom. My sister Julie was like my Mom, and she is fabulous. She and her husband are like grandparents to my kids.

I did not pick up MacKeeper yet, but I will. Thanks for the info.

Katie - Some relationships are just more damaging than they are worth. We don't get to choose family, but we do get to choose how we let people treat us. Relationships can be severed in anger, but they can also be severed with love. I think that's what some people have a hard time understanding - sometimes we just have to step away in order to be healthy ourselves.

And now I have to step away for a bit - RL interrupts, but when I come back I will tell you the Chex Mix story and cheer you all up!

HI Mamie! Hope you are having a great day!

So far, so good, Chelle! We got the girls' stuff back in their bedroom, and ran some errands. Now I am enjoying the beautiful day by sitting outside and reading on the deck, a perfect afternoon.

After reading about your Mom I just sat here a bit looking out the window at the setting sun, watching some bugs all lit up by the sun dancing around in the leaves. So many people plunge into having families, more back then but it still goes on, only to find that they don't want to be parents or aren't very good at it, because they don't enjoy children or don't know how to enjoy them, or what have you, and the way our society is structured there is so much pressure to do the family thing, so then they are ashamed and angry and feel like failures...... -- to me it's one of the 'dirty little secrets' that people won't admit or talk about openly -- I've watched several people close to me struggle with their children, one woman I am close to said to me once, very wistfully, "You seem to have so much fun with the children." (My one, her two). But truly it is a total and complete mystery to her, even though she does absolutely everything a person is supposed to do for them.

Have you read the Anne Tyler about the woman - kids grown up more or less, husband self-sufficient enough, who just picks up her purse and gets on a bus and rides it until she decides randomly to get off, where she starts a whole new life. It's one of her best, I think - it's about giving, being appreciated, and character - you can't get away from who you are -- I'll try and figure out the title and come back.

It's called Ladder of Years - she gets re-involved with a family too - adding another layer of complexity -

Lucy- I always appreciate what you have to say; you always put so much thought and heart into how you think about things. I always wonder why people seem to need others to reaffirm their own choices, and seem to want to find that affirmation in imitation. We are each different individuals and so it only makes sense that we would chose different paths and different lifestyles - isn't that what is beautiful about individuality? And yet we see the pressures to conform to a certain lifestyle, to walk a chosen path. I always tell my children to figure out who they are first, answer for themselves the questions what makes you happy and what do you want. Define yourself, I tell them, because others will always want to define you, but if you know for yourself who you are, then they will not be able to. Don't let others make your choices for you or take your choices away from you. We are not supposed to all travel the same path or choose the same destination, we are meant to share the journey that is life, and our differences are meant to be our strengths.

I think that my Mom never got to define herself, and that she felt that her choices were limited. Over the years, this made her bitter and mean-spirited. It didn't break her, but it bent her. It reminds me of that line from Cutting for Stone:

"But there's another kind of hole, and that is the wound that divides family. Sometimes this wound occurs at birth, sometimes it happens later. We are all fixing what is broken. It is the task of a lifetime. We'll leave much unfinished for the next generation."

I love what you shared with me, and I will hunt down that book. I have not read any Anne Tyler actually, and so I will start with that one.

My absolute favorite is one of the earliest ones, The Clockwinder. Of course, it was the first one I read, which might have something to do with it.

Crazy--I love the message you share with your children. It's so true and our kids need to hear it over and over until they believe it. And I love Anne Tyler -- will have to find Ladder of Years.

This is such an interesting discussion about families and mothers. There is a newspaper here which is always running articles about "career women" with no children who have put their careers before family and will come to regret it etc, and every time I read one I think that these are not women choosing career *over* children - they are women who *just don't want children*. And that leaves you with a lot of time on your hands, so, in the absence of a lottery win, you work :-) Years ago, they would have had children anyway, because (a) that's what everyone did and (b) there were fewer jobs for women that paid enough to support themselves over an entire working life. I don't know anyone who has chosen career over children - all my friends without children are that way because they don't want children. But that is such a threatening choice for a lot of people, although I have never worked out why. If, these days, women are free to choose whether to have children or not, they shouldn't care if other people make other choices, but the reality is so very different!

Mamie - I agree with lots of the comments on here regarding the fact that your conversations are always engrossing. As you will recall I have parental blues but with my father who is currently locked in a bizarre tussle with my brother that he seems determined to resolve by burning every possible bridge in his path. Today I found out that he has informed the UK IRS that my brother had benefits from the company over a period of 5 years which were not declared or taxed and has exaggerated this alarmingly. Notwithstanding that it is father and son (albeit that there certainly had been some minor infractions) he was by far in a way a greater abuser of the system than Peter ever was. The IRS will now investigate the company fully and whilst Peter has some taxes to pay he may be facing criminal charges as he had lied to the IRS about the purposes of an all-expenses paid trip to Australia for him, his girlfriend and her daughter/son-in-law. What a vindictive fool.

Such an interesting discussion! I fully agree with Susan's post #64, myself being one of those 'career-women', who in reality just never wanted children. The alternative explanation used to be 'she hasn't found the right man yet'. Sure. I always looked for men who didn't want kids either and once even ended a good and long relationship because I knew he would only ever be really happy with a family (and 1.5 years later he was married and had his first son).

I knew it from an early age, and I am grateful I was born at a time when it was possible for me to take that choice. My mother mentioned to me that she was not too eager to have kids as well, but at that time you just had them. Maybe this explains why we didn't have a good relationship during my childhood. I like children and am happy for my friends who started families, just could never see myself as a mother.

#65: Paul, I am at a loss for words. Indifference is one thing, but were does the meanness come from?

I agree, you make it possible Mamie, for some great discussions. Good atmo!

I don't think I would have done so well had I had several children. Not without a lot more support. While my dau was tiny I was in heaven, but later I do want to admit that I used to cry sometimes at the playground a) I was always the oldest mother there (mid-forties when my daughter was 3-6) and I was 'different,' I didn't totally embrace the identity - I was too old and had been through too much self-examination (about my reasons for wanting a child, among others - I had massive difficulties, myriad miscarriages and in fact quit the whole thing, then got firmly definitively pregnant) so that I wasn't comfortable blabbing endlessly about child-related things, I wanted, badly, to talk, say ABOUT WHAT I WAS READING AND THINKING!!!! how weird is that! c) my daughter was also the kind that was always crawling away FAST or later, running ditto, and calling out "Look at me!" so I never had much chance of talking to anyone anyway.... I was so bored at those times that I really hardly knew how to deal with it...... Since I worked at home, I thought I could manage, but of course, ha ha, no way. I ended up sharing a studio with someone else who also had a baby and hiring someone half day a few days a week. I might have gone stark raving mad if I hadn't - but I had been a free agent to the age of 41. As long as I had that time I was happy - I enjoyed everything but I still wanted to be me and stay firmly grounded in the separate person that I am, the one that isn't 'MOOOOMMMMMMM????." My mother fell ill just when things were easing up (2nd grade) and that made things v. complicated again for another long stretch. I was lucky -- the woman who had come half-days, earlier switched to picking her up at school and spending time in the late afternoons so I could do what I needed to do for my mother (overseeing her care, visiting, and dismantling her house) as well as keep on having a little time to myself. It was one of those little miracles - that she was suddenly free to do that at exactly the right time and that it worked incredibly well for her as well.

OK that's enough!

Morning Mamie! Hope you have a great 4th! Stay cool in the shade.

Wow, marvelous discussion, Mamie!

I really appreciate Lucy's post in #60. I don't know why people get so bent out of shape when a woman chooses not to have children. Frankly, it's nobody's darn business if or why a woman is childless. Perhaps if more women who didn't want kids actually didn't have them, we'd have fewer kids who were abused, neglected, or generally unhappy in their childhoods.


glitter-graphics.com

Happy Fourth!! Any plans? Here are some fireworks because I know you are too dry to have them...

Really interesting discussion about mothers and children. Like Lucy I had my son quite late (age 38) but after 11 years of marriage when we had completely given up on the idea of having children. Had all the investigations & treatment but nothing seemed to work and they could not discover what was the underlying cause of the infertility. Luckily for me I didn't feel out of place because of my age - where we live 38 might be old for a first baby but there were lots of mothers around who had had second or third children in their late thirties or early forties. I have a feeling that in the UK we might have children on average later than in the US - I think I read somewhere recently that the mother's average age when she has her first child is nearly 30 here. We arranged our child care very differently though in that it was my husband that stayed at home once I had finished my maternity leave. He worked part-time (maximum 2 days a week) until J was seven. It was really just a financial decision rather than career obsession on my part but it worked out really well for us. I don't think my relationship with J has suffered at all because of this arrangement.

When I was 38 my oldest child was 19, my youngest was 14 ( 19, 17, 15, 14).
That is why I feel so.. empty, I think? When I was 10 I had to start caring for my younger
sister and the house.. a lot of it. Then I married at 18 ( barely) and at 19 had Adam.
At that time, it was common here for girls to marry young..
I had no hope of college or decent income.. and believe me when I tell you that I did not know
myself well enough to marry. But there you have it! And I regret nothing, because I have my
kids. Imperfect, but mine and I love them more than life itself.. like we all do.

I do not recommend early marriage or childbirth though.
My life would probably been very different if I had waited 5 years..
and learned.. and accepted.. more about myself. But it is what it is, and I have my kids.
I have a home, and ....despite some very difficult times, my kids never had to go to bed hungry one time.
Whew!

Lucy - I added that one to my WL also. Our library has the first one but not the second one.

Kim - You're so right, kids need to hear it over and over again until they believe it. And I think a lot of adults need to shift their focus onto defining their own selves instead of worrying about how others are defining themselves.

Susan - That whole discussion has always been fascinating because I never understood what difference it makes. Get married or don't, have children or don't, work outside the home or don't....why do people feel like they have the right to weigh in on the decisions that others make? We are all different so it makes sense that we would want different things.

Paul - Your family situation makes me so sad. While my Mom is not interested in being a part of her grandchildren's lives, and while she is oh so frustrating and difficult to deal with, she would never intentionally set out to hurt us. Your Dad is a piece of work. I am sorry that you and your brother have to deal with him.

Nathalie - I have a sister who has never gotten married or had children, and she never wanted either. She just wanted to live life on her own terms and make her own decisions. I think those people who know what they want and understand what will make them happy are light years ahead of those who make choices based on fitting in. I have a niece who married a year ago, and she and her husband are both turning thirty this year. She said that suddenly everyone is asking them when are they going to have children. It's a pressure, she says, because they don't even know if they want children. This is what I am talking about - why do people pressure others to make the same choices that they made? Is it somehow reaffirming to them because if someone else is choosing the same thing, then it reaffirms their decision?

Lucy - I know exactly what you are saying about not fitting in with the other mothers. I didn't have the age thing, mine was more of an attitude thing. Like you, I didn't want to spend all my time talking about the kids - let's get together and let the kids entertain each other while we talk about adult things. Um...no...not done. It makes you want to stand up on the nearest chair and shout, "I have a college degree, I read books, I follow current events, I am an interesting person - do you think we could discuss something other than potty training or nap times?" Luckily for me, when the kids were little, Craig had Wednesdays off, and so on Wednesday evenings we had a babysitter come and take care of the children while we went out to dinner and talked about everything except the children. When the kids were older and we were homeschooling, on Wednesdays Craig taught and I had a day out all to myself - fabulous!! You need those moments of down time in order to reboot and remain sane. And I hear what you are saying about identity because while I absolutely love being Rae, Dan, Abby and Birdy's Mom, I am also Mamie, who is a fun and interesting person who happens to also be a Mom.

Mark - Nice to see you! Don't be afraid to stick your head in here!

Terri - Amen!

Kim - Thanks for the fireworks! We are planning to do whatever we want!! Just hanging out and taking it easy. We do have two showings tomorrow, so probably a little bit of cleaning late in the day just to get it out of the way.

Rhian - I think maybe women are starting to have children later in life here - makes sense to me, actually, especially with the shape the economy is in. I was twenty-five when I had Rae, and she was a surprise. I was actually on birth control when I got pregnant with her - yes, that can happen! So then we just kept going so that the kids would be close in age. So, I like to say that I gave birth in '92,'94,'96', and '98, and in the millennium I rested. I stayed home with the kids first and foremost because I wanted to, but it would have cost us a fortune to pay for childcare. Craig's job paid more than enough for me to stay home, and it was good to have one of us at home providing an anchor with his crazy work schedule - he had Wednesdays off, but worked a lot of weekends and had a busy call schedule. My degree is in Medical Technology, so the only place I could work here would have been at the hospital which meant that I would have to work some weekends and holidays - trying to coordinate that with Craig's schedule would have been wacky. Sounds like you and your husband came up with a great solution. Whatever works, that's what I think - if it works and everybody is happy with it, then that's a good solution.

Kath - I could not imagine handling all of that at such a young age! I am 45, and my kids are about the same ages that yours were when you were 38 (I have 20, 17, 16,and 13). Sounds like you did a great job. And look at you now - so much compassion and kindness. The empty might be because you need to refill your tank - put yourself first for a change because for so many years you have been putting everybody else first. I see you all the time putting the needs of others before your own - when do you get to come first? Maybe now. Maybe today. What do you want for yourself, Kath?

What I want, is impossible.. truly not possible. So I try to be okay with what I have :)

Delurking to say I've found people's comments re motherhood really thought-provoking. I keep trying to write something more personal and it's not working so I just wanted to say thank you to everyone who did.

This is really a fascinating conversation about motherhood and women's choices. I'm 34 and realized probably in my late 20s that I didn't want children. I was lucky to fall in love with a man who felt the same, so now we get each other all to ourselves :) But it is hard sometimes to have to explain our choices to other people, including family and friends, but I really believe there are a lot of men and women out there who have children because it is expected of them and they don't think hard enough about whether it is what they want and if they are willing to make the sacrifices necessary to be a good parent. To be quite honest, I have zero interest in making those sacrifices. I don't think that makes me a bad person; I wish more women thought about these things before they had kids...

PS: I'm four glasses into a bottle of sauvignon blanc so if this doesn't make any sense..........

Kath - If what you want is impossible, then we need to think about what you want that is possible. We'll have to put our thinking caps on, and we will need alcoholic beverages.

Heather - Glad you delurked. If you think of what you want to say, you can just jump in at any time. In the meantime, we love having you here.

Katie - Right, it doesn't make you a bad person - it makes you an honest one, an intelligent one. That is exactly what I mean about defining yourself - taking the time to understand what makes you happy and what you want out of life. It makes me sad that you feel like you have to explain your choices to others. Women (and men) should be able to choose for themselves what they want without feeling like they need to justify their decisions. Some things we do get to decide and some things we don't, so I think we need to be really careful about the decisions that we do get to make because they are like gifts. (And I am on my second glass of Chardonnay so what you are saying makes complete sense to me.)

Not to mention a time machine.....

:)

Hi Mamie, hope you are having a great 4th of July!

Mamie - sorry to sneak fatherhood travails onto the motherhood discussion which is fascinating. I think that there is a trend to have children at a slightly later age but I am not sure whether this is good or bad for ongoing mother/daughter or son relationships. On the one hand you are maybe less able at a yound age to cope with the stresses and strains of motherhood and providing for the kids but on the other you are stronger. On the one hand you get to an age when you are still comparatively young and have plenty to contribute but your kids don't need your TLC quite so much (I can see that happening with my daughter and SWMBO already Kath) whilst on the other surely closer generationally you have more in common with your kids. The upshot life is tough!

Mamie, I hope your fourth of July has been a good one. I can't chime in on the mom conversation much, other than to say that I'm glad kind and thinking people choose to have children.

There are some non-professional fireworks being set off at Martin Luther King, Jr, Park near our house (about three blocks away). Very pretty but the neighborhood canines are less than thrilled.

yup. Life is tough. There is never a perfect age to have kids. Life happens as it happens.
Raising my kids was the absolute BEST time of my life . I loved it. We did all sorts of things
and had fun and they were good kids and I had plenty of energy to cope. Dan was laid off a lot,
we never had money to do anything like vacations or? And he drank .. a lot .. until my oldest was 12..
the year we lost our home during the steel exodus. Then he quit. It has always been rocky financially..
but others have had it much much worse. Dan does work. He never complains .. he works a lot . He
never bothered with the kids ( at all ) but he did bring home a paycheck when he could.
Still, I miss those days.. go figure.

Morning Kath - You always make me smile!

Judy - We did have a very nice Fourth. It seemed like the weekend, though, so now my week is messed up. We have two showings today, and I am excited to have all the repairs done and be back to showing the house. Now we just need the right buyer...

Paul - I thought your fatherhood travails for right into the discussion. We were talking about choices and choosing or not choosing parenthood. We were talking about parent/child relationships, so it was a good fit, I thought. Anyway, we always want to hear whatever you have to say.

I don't think there is any right answer to the question of younger vs. older parenting. I think it really depends on the individual. It's less a question of physical age and more a question of where your heart lies.

Ellen - I think the discussion started out about Moms but turned into a discussion about choices and about how women feel pressured to choose certain things.

No fireworks here -it's too dry, so they were cancelled. We heard a few people setting them off in the neighborhoods, but nothing like what we usually hear. How was Tennessee?

Kath - Maybe because you felt needed? And because you could fix things? When kids are little you can fix almost anything, but as they get older, there is less stuff that you can fix, and it's hard to see them get hurt even though you know that is part of growing up. So far, my favorite time of life is always the one that I am in. I embrace each age and each new milestone and think, what next? I try to really soak up every moment of the journey because we never know how long our journey will be - I try to be conscious of the fact that my children learn just as much from my actions as they do from my words.

Definitely no right answers older/younger!

Morning Lucy! So very true!

Heading for Tennessee tomorrow.
I hear it's hot. Like 103+ hot.
Ugh.

See, Ellen - My days are all mixed up, I keep thinking we just had a weekend. Thursday, today is Thursday. Well, have fun in Tennessee. Even if it is hot, at least it is also beautiful.

Some JUNE Stats

Total Books Read for June:
* a total of 11 authors, 9 of them were new to me
* original publication dates ranged from 1895 (The Time Machine) – 2009 (Wolf Hall)
* NO ABANDONED BOOKS
* 10 books were fiction, 1 was non-fiction

Author gender:
male: 9
female: 2

Author Nationality:
American: 5
English: 5
Chinese: 1

Medium:
Hardcover: 1
Paperback: 3
ebook: 7
Audiobook:0

Source:
Purchased in 2012: 8
Off My Shelf: 2
Library Book: 1

Multiple Books Read by Same Author:
None

Genre:
Mystery/Thriller: 2
Historical fiction/Literature: 6
Science Fiction: 1
Short Story Collection: 1
Juvenile/YA: 0
Non-fiction: 1

*what you should know about my library - I am not trying to decrease the number of books that I purchase in a calendar year, I am simply aiming to also make a significant dent in the piles of books already sitting on my shelves that are unread.

2012 STATS (Through the end of June)

67 Books Read
* 41 new to me authors
* 43 male/ 24 female
* 61 fiction/ 6 non-fiction

FORMAT
* audio: 2
* Kindle: 33
* Real Books: 32

SOURCE
* Off My Shelves: 18
* Purchased and read in 2012: 41 (+1 free download)
* Library Books: 7

Multiple Books Read by Same Author
* John Steinbeck: 6
* J. R. R. Tolkien: 3
* Colin Cotterill: 4
* Deborah Crombie: 2
* Dennis Lehane: 2
*Michael Connelly: 2

Five Star Reads
* 11/22/63 by Stephen King
* The Lord of the Rings by J .R. R. Tolkien
* Mockingbird by Kathryn Erskine
* 84, Charing Cross Road by Helene Hanff
* Dandelion Wine by Ray Bradbury

Best Discovery
* Dr. Siri!!

Impressive! How was your day ??
Showings go alright ?

Hi Mamie. You always have so much interesting stuff going on here. I'm having one of my bad days, so don't think I can contribute to the discussion about our moms and the will to be a mother without turning into a mass of self-pity. I do admire your positivity and strength of character and so wish it was true for me that one can just choose to adopt that kind of attitude, but days like today, I just feel like my nervous system is on the edge of collapse and am just in survival mode...

I'll share what I can for now: my mom did want and loved me, but she was on her own with her share of incredible difficulties, always on the verge and in actual state of mental collapse much of the time. She raised me as she herself would have liked to be raised I guess, but I'm not anything like her revolutionary barrier-breaking self, so it was not optimal for me. But she did and does love me, just... is still just a child herself. Sometimes I wish I could just separate myself from my parents (I almost typed "children", I swear! yikes!), but they're not bad people, just misguided, and I mostly feel sorry for them. I badly wanted children when I was younger, but when I realized just how much mental illness had been handed down to me in the gene pool from both sides, figured I'd best put a stop to that propagation and close up shop, besides which struggling as I do, I couldn't possibly offer children a stable and comforting environment which they so badly need. I convinced myself I wanted first and foremost to be a career woman and didn't like children. Now I have to live with my choices.

I was going to delete this and send you a PM instead, but sometimes I think that I need to speak up, even when it's to say things that are not necessarily pleasant to hear, but are part of life too.

Love you stats by the way. *feeble smile*

Kath - The showings went well, I think. The second showing was scheduled for an hour, and they were here for an extra 3/4 hour, so I think that bodes well. Don't think they would have spent that much time if they weren't interested.

My day was...HOT! The first showing wasn't too bad - we took the dogs to the park. It was hot, but they were excited to be at the park, so they did really well. The second showing was a drag - it was 98 and absolutely no breeze with high humidity, so REALLY HOT. The dogs were hot, the kids were hot, I was hot...you get the idea. And then we drove by the house at 3:30 when they were supposed to be gone, and they were still there. SO, we drove to the church that is just down the street - figured we'd wait in the parking lot as they couldn't be too much longer and we could see when they pulled out of the driveway from there. 45 minutes later they pulled out. Did I mention it was hot? I think they should make us an offer just for keeping us out of our home so long on such a hot and miserable day.

How was your day?

Ilana - So very glad that you didn't delete your post! Thanks for sharing with us. Is it crazy for me to say that as an adult it is comforting for me to hear that so many others grew up in dysfunctional families? It makes me feel not alone. And it is a credit to you that you are so sweet and honest and thoughtful when you grew up in such a stressful and difficult environment. I hate that you had a bad day and that you are feeling like it is taking everything that you have just to cope. I'm so honored that you felt like you could share what you are feeling here. When you say that when you were younger you badly wanted children but for various reasons felt that you couldn't provide the necessary stability and environment it makes my jaw drop. Do you see how thoughtful that statement shows you to be?! You thought things through and arrived at a decision that says so much about who you are - you care about people and you care about how you impact the world and those around you. You are not selfish or self-centered. Look at you with so much greatness going on inside of you! I hope that tomorrow is a better day and that you get good rest tonight. I will be thinking about you and sending positive thoughts your way.

Hi Mamie- Mine was HOT too! Super HOT! I did end up meeting another LTer this evening, Lisa (labfs39) and it was very nice. These LTers are a special breed, let me tell ya!

Hi Mark! I really try not to whine too much, but it was HOT today! At least I did not have to be walking around in it delivering other people's mail. How did you do that - I might have just sat down and cried. Is there relief coming? A breeze at least? I think tomorrow it is supposed to be over 100 here- UGH.

How fun to meet another LTer! You are on a role this year with that! And I completely agree, they are a special breed indeed! What did I do last year without all of you?

I think it'll be 102 tomorrow. (Ugh!) And then low 90s, with thunderstorms on Saturday and 80s Sunday. Bless the Lord.

"What did I do last year without all of you?" I dunno, watch TV or crossword puzzles?

Two words: you're awesome.

ok, technically, I guess that's 3 words.

I didn't mean to suggest that my own family wasn't dysfunctional when I was a child growing up because it certainly was. My father was mentally ill (probably bipolar) but refused to see a doctor about it or maybe it just wasn't accepted in the fifties and sixties like it is today. It made for some of the most miserable holidays. That's what stands out to me the terrible Christmas dinners especially. My mother should have divorced him but, again, not really done much in those days so we all suffered through it and I was lucky enough to graduate from college, get a good teaching job and marry a great guy who go me away from the hysteria and enabled me to have a normal life. We waited eight years to start a family and that was just right for us but then the real work of working full time and raising a family which is hard, hard, hard no matter how you slice it. I like to think we did a good job and I can see that my son will probably never have children. He and his wife are really involved in their careers (both engineers) and are very happy w/o the added burden of children. And my daughter married at almost thirty and although I think she will have children I'm not positive. And that's fine too. Whether or not I have grandchildren isn't important. They need to be happy with their lives, whatever they choose. And that's what my main point is: there are many paths and we aren't all going to choose the same one. And there is no right one.

Family dysfunctional? Definitely. Mother with serious depression, father who loved drink too much, older brother with debilitating psychotic illness..... thank goodness for years of therapy. and some luck in not inheriting some of the genes. And similar decision-making to that of Ilana -- just stop this gene pool now. And maybe a bit of selfishness on my part....

I'm glad you're showing the house again, Mamie, although I would think the heat would slow things down a tad. We had a realtor visit us this evening. She was awesome but confirmed that if we sell now we've lost a huge (for us) chunk of money. So -- not going anywhere any time soon. Trying to appreciate all that we have, including two jobs and the ability to pay our (admittedly exorbitant) mortgage. Never want for dinner. Never want for heat (or at least fleece jacket).

Tomorrow is a travel day for me and then I will be almost-without-internet-access for several days. So, have a good week.

I fell so bad for all of you in the middle of the country and mid-Atlantic. I don't do well with heat at all (and I'm talking anything over 80) so what you're going through sounds just awful. I hope you get some relief SOON!!

My family's a bit dysfunctional too, but I love them anyway. :) I imagine truly "functional" families are rare?

yep. Families.. I bet we all have some stories we could tell...
It seems that in my family, it was the men on both sides that were ... well.
I had an uncle though, that was one of the best men ever. He was so kind and
loving. A good man.

Hey Mamie! What an interesting thread! There's so much going on! Although it happend already been some days ago, I have to say that I loved your rubber ducky story. It reminded my of something my brothers did when they were younger: There were matchbox cars and a hammer. ...and let's just say they played scrapyard. My parents didn't react as relaxed and calm as you did...

I love your reading lists and statistics! I'm creating a plan for myself because I have so many unread books!

The discussion about dysfunctional families, mothers and career women is extremely gripping! I can not contribute anything new to the topic. I just know too well what you're talking about and it's somehow comforting that other people are making the same experiences. You are so right when you saying: Some relationships are just more damaging than they are worth.

Mark - It's supposed to be 101 today, 103 tomorrow, 87 with possible showers on Sunday! In an ironic twist of fate, it will be 94 down in Albany, Georgia, then 96 tomorrow. I can't wait to move down south and cool off!!!

I probably was doing crossword puzzles and watching tv. I also kept a reading journal last year for the very first time ever - now I so wish I had been doing that all these years.

Ilana - Aw, shucks! Thanks! You're pretty awesome yourself.

Bonnie - I think you're right; I think a lot of people didn't seek treatment because of the stigma attached to it, and also because the treatment options were not what they were today. Some treatments did more harm than good. Glad you found that right someone to share and build a life with. Raising a family is hard - I am always amazed at all the single parents who do such a great job because I think it's hard with two people, I can't imagine doing it all by myself. If you do get to be a grandma, I think you will be a great one - sounds like you did good with your kids. And that's so true that there is no right path, no one right answer. We just do the best we can and try to make decisions that that enable us to lead the fullest lives possible. When we were looking at jobs for Craig, he would say is this the right place for us, and when we decided on Georgia, still he would say, will this be the right fit? I said I don't think there is one right place or one right fit - we can be happy anywhere (um...as long as there is indoor plumbing and central air). There is only the realm of possibilities, so you choose the one that you think will be the best for you at that time. Then you work hard to make the most of it and you seek happiness because it doesn't always come knocking on your door - although that would be so great.

Ellen - I don't think it's at all selfish not to want children. I think it's a choice just like any other. Is it selfish for me to want to stay home and raise mine instead of working full time? I think that goes back to defining yourself and figuring out what's right for you. We all contribute to the universe in different ways.

I am sorry to hear that you would lose so much money if you sold the house right now, but I do think the housing market is recovering - it is just slow going. Still, good for you for exploring all of your options because now you know. Perhaps in a few years you can revisit the discussion - that commute is a zinger! I hope you enjoy your time in Tennessee - I think it is such a beautiful state, and the weather is supposed to start cooling back down to somewhere near normal temps starting on Sunday.

Reba - Thank you for your sympathies. I hope we get some relief soon, too. Our poor landscaping is suffering with the heat and lack of much rainfall and only me to look after it - Craig has the green thumb. I am trying really hard to just not kill anything.

Rachel - I guess functional families are rare - perhaps a myth?!

Kath - I had a really terrific uncle, too. My Dad came from a big family - nine kids. One of his younger brothers never married, but he lived in Fort Wayne and came over to the house all the time to visit with my Dad. He was so funny, and we all thought he was charming because he dressed so well and he loved to laugh. My Dad was a man of few words, but my Uncle Evan loved to talk. They were so cute together because they looked so much alike that they could have been twins, but their personalities were so different.

Kathy - It is so great to see you back on the threads! Glad you liked the rubber ducky story, and I can just imagine the scenario that involved a hammer and matchbox cars!!

I love having a reading plan even when I end up completely ignoring it! Not this month, though, I really want to get to each of those books, so we'll see what I can knock off of that list. I might actually go faster if I read just one book at a time, but I am a complete nut about reading multiple books at the same time because I like having a choice on a daily basis.

Glad you are following the dysfunctional family discussion - it is so interesting to me to hear everybody's stories and bits of wisdom. I am getting a lot out of it, so thanks everyone for sharing.

I am simply aiming to also make a significant dent in the piles of books already sitting on my shelves that are unread.

I hear you, Mamie.

As always, another interesting discussion on your thread that I'm following with no comments to make because my family is rather ho-hum. Either I am in denial, or my family isn't what I'd call dysfunctional compared with the hubster's family and those of some friends. I think of my family more of a still lake which ripples gently only during a breeze. I always did wish I came from a bigger family though. With a large age gap between my brother and myself, I would have liked more siblings between my brother (9 years older) and I.

Caro.. if your family is anything like you... ho hum is not what they are.
They may not be dysfunctional, but they are not ho hum! lol

It was a wonderful afternoon here, for me.. and now I am just sitting here with the furkids..
relaxing and catching up online :)

Hope you have a nice peaceful evening, too!

:)

Caro - I like how you think of your family: "a still lake which ripples gently only during a breeze" - and so poetic, too! I like to think of my family as a swamp that has gators and snakes living in it, which appears to be still but at any moment you might hear a thrashing sound followed by a wicked splashing, followed by complete silence. Just kidding! That is a bit of a gap between you and your brother. I have five older sisters that are very close in age and then a seven year gap and then me. I always thought it would be fun to be more in the thick of things, but being the baby has its merits, too.

Glad you had a wonderful afternoon, Kath. I did, too! No showings today, but that is a good thing because it was too hot to take the dogs out in the car. Another hot one tomorrow and then it is supposed to be better.

Okay, for anyone interested, there is going to be a group read of Ray Bradbury's Something Wicked This Way Comes this weekend. Caro set up the thread, so thanks for that, Caro! And here is a link to the group read: Wicked link

Thanks Mamie! I've been over to the Wicked Link! I appreciate you & Caro for getting this going, otherwise it would have been another title, waiting in line. And you know that's a long-ass line too!

So true! And I can't take any credit for the group read idea - it was totally Caro and Kath all the way.

Nope, Caro got the group ball rolling.. I am happy enough to read all alone in the corner :P
But thanks for the hat tip anyway ! I am itching to open it up...

Wow! I just spent the evening reading your thread, Mamie!
You are ALL awesome! And Mamie, you are something wonderful ;-)

#31 - I was blown away by your message to Nathalie...

and
"Some relationships are just more damaging than they are worth. We don't get to choose family, but we do get to choose how we let people treat us. Relationships can be severed in anger, but they can also be severed with love. I think that's what some people have a hard time understanding - sometimes we just have to step away in order to be healthy ourselves."
Every word a gem! I feel a little better about my sister and myself now... let's say, less guilty. We need the distance and I do love her.

Thanks so much for all the beautiful sharing. I'm humbled.

Your stories of packing everyone and pets into the car on hot days for the showings remind me of my own experiences selling our last house.
If it's any encouragement, the ones that stayed later than expected and pushed me back to McDonald's for another tall cup of iced tea - they were the ones who bought our house!

Best wishes for a SALE!

So fascinating, our different experiences of motherhood.

My mum was young, immature, narcissistic and newly wed when she became pregnant with me, her first child. She had been an indulged only child and expected her new husband to carry on treating her like a princess. She has told me and my sister that she was very jealous of me at my Christening ceremony(I was a couple of months old) because I was getting all the attention and I think things went downhill from then on!

In my twenties, I was torn between intense hormonal broodiness and a fear of being a mother myself. I thought I would be ok with boys as I already had a maternal relationship with my brother who is fourteen years younger but the thought of having girls worried me as I was concerned that I might repeat mistakes or project too much of my own memories of my youth onto my daughter.

At 30 and 32, I had my two wonderful boys, now 11 and 14 so maybe the universe agreed! Motherhood has been a complete joy and my only fear now is empty nest syndrome. My fourteen year old looked over my shoulder when I was reading the earlier posts and asked what people were saying. When I told him that they were talking about the sort of parents they'd had, he said that he would write that he has the best parents ever! I just hope he still thinks that when he's thirty!

>114 Soupdragon:
It must be nice hearing that from your son. My mom made a lot of mistakes because she was chronically depressed AND she'd been a nun for 15 years, so she had expected kids to jump and ask how high on the way up. But I have to say that at 30, I understand and empathize with her a lot more than I did when I was a kid. Hindsight is 20/20, right?

A mom that was an ex nun? I actually know 2 ex nuns that left and had 4 kids each.
I give them kudos for trying and kudos for leaving when they decided it might not be right.
I waver between thinking that nun or priest is a brilliant career choice and thinking it is semi slavery.

I am just popping in to see what is happening in one of the most happening threads in 75. There is
always great discussion or super fun with a wee bit of natures calamity tossed in for flavor :)

I am setting my hopes on the long lookers for monday... and crossing fingers for it.
I think it will be nice to read Something Wicked with you today :) I am on page 40.. I read a bit before I got up and out of bed. It is pulling me back to it, but I want to visit a few threads first.

Hope all is well and happy. I am thinking that we should all ( 75ers) should start trying to push a cool (wet) front down from Canada. Surely they have one way up north somewhere? If we all have at it a few times a day, maybe we could cover the country with it! And all of those Seattle folk who are enjoying a nice summer could help to nudge it over a bit, too :)

I'd be happy to send you all some rain from the UK! I went to the supermarket this morning in the bright sunshine, only to get caught on the way home in a *monsoon* (I should have remembered that it always rains during Wimbledon). In the end I was so wet that there was no point trying to shelter from it, and I squelched my way home, dripping all the way, mascara running and just thankful I was going home, and not out somewhere. I was on my second set of clothes by 10.30. I have to go to New York the week after next, and I was alarmed to see yesterday that it's 39C there at the moment. I really hope it cools down soon.

Hi Mamie! I have nothing to contribute, just stopping in to see ya :)

The Director of Finance in my company is an ex-priest, and you can just see it in him. He's such a gentle soul and an all round sweet guy ...which is a shame because he needs to be a little more tough to manage some of his incompetent staff who walk all over him because he's so non-confrontational. He has 2 darling boys who are terrors on their ice hockey team ... they must get their blood-thirsty genes from his wife. Haha

I loved the analogy you gave of your family in response to Caro's poetic image, Mamie. I'll try to think what mine makes me think of, as I drive back from Ottawa on Monday from this upcoming get-together tomorrow!

It rained here :) It only rained for 3 minutes and the sun was shining , but it rained :)

Everytime when I come to this thread, there's a new almost more interesting discussion going on. But I was still thinking about the families-and-mothers-topic and I remembered a quote from East of Eden (It's on the first twenty pages, so I hope I won't spoiler too much - as you are reading the book, too.):

"When a child first catches adults out -- when it first walks into his grave little head that adults do not always have divine intelligence, that their judgments are not always wise, their thinking true, their sentences just -- his world falls into panic desolation. The gods are fallen and all safety gone. And there is one sure thing about the fall of gods: they do not fall a little; they crash and shatter or sink deeply into green muck. It is a tedious job to build them up again; they never quite shine. And the child's world is never quite whole again. It is an aching kind of growing."

I think the moment Steinbeck describes here is a crucial one in every child's life. We all have to learn someday that parent's aren't perfect, that they had a life and made their experiences even before we were born - and that they're the result of their experiences whether they were good or bad. We simply cannot fully comprehend their decisions. So I think that it's really great that you've learned to deal with your mother's behaviour and that you can accept it!

Hope all is well in Mamie-land :)
I am not used to Mamie silence... I do hope that you weren't having to hang out in the heat so
that your house can be shown. On the other hand.. popping out for an hour might lead to moving out for good soon so?

Youhaven't melted have you? 8-O

Thanks everyone for stopping in here while I was busy with RL. I so appreciate every comment and I will get to individual responses in a moment, but first I will catch you up a bit. Don't get excited - we did not sell the house yet! Yesterday was busy but fun. We watched Wimbledon - the women's finals were yesterday. Serena once again took home the big prize in both singles and doubles. She played very well, but I was rooting for the other young lady as I always love to see somebody win it for the first time. At least she had to play three sets. Then we did The Big Clean, like we do every weekend, then grocery shopping. I don't normally go to the grocery store on the weekend because it is crazy then, but we had no eggs, no bread... you get the picture. It wasn't horrible, but it was packed. Then home again where we decided to make baked potato bar for lupper (late lunch, early supper). We like to make all our fixin's, so we chopped up the bacon and then fried it up, sautéd mushrooms and onions, then cooked lean pork sausage and ground turkey together (I like to use a pound of each so that we have a bit for the potatoes and can then use the rest in different meals throughout the week). After eating our spuds, we decided to prep all the fresh fruit so that it was ready to just grab from the refrigerator. The great thing about this time of year is all the fresh produce. Then we picked out a couple of new recipes to try during the week - we will definitely be making Judy's chicken sate this week, we are also trying a sausage and black-eyed pea hash, a melty monsieur (which is a variation of a croque monsieur), and a double-cherry upside-down cake.

We spent the evening painting our toenails - um, just us girls. Then we watched multiple episodes of Bones while lounging upstairs on the big bed (Craig and I have this huge king size bed that we bought just so that we could all sit on it together to watch tv or read books). Rae loves the main character of Bones because Dr. Temperance Brennan takes everything literally, which is exactly what Rae does. We love to have tv marathons where we will watch multiple episodes of the same show. Abby is organizing a movie night next weekend for a few friends, so looks like I will have ten to twelve teenagers over next Saturday, which should be fun.

Needless to say, I didn't get much reading done - read about the first third of Something Wicked This Way Comes, so I need to get going on that today. Speaking of today - it is so lovely weather wise - breezy and only 80 right now. Supposed to get up to 87, with a chance of showers. WahHOO!! I'm out on the deck right now soaking it all up - so wonderful. I am taping Wimbledon so we can all watch it together as the kids are still sleeping - well, not Birdy who is always an early riser. So if you know who won, please don't tell me as I won't be watching it until later this afternoon. On tap for today is washing up all of the bedding and reading.

Kath - I thought you and Caro were who started the discussion about reading it this weekend. I know that you read the entire thing yesterday - you're so fast! I was expecting it to be a continuation of Doug's story, but it just shares the same setting. I read Farewell Summer already this month, but haven't posted my review of it yet - have you read that? It is a continuation of the story from Dandelion Wine. I need to post my review - I am falling behind as I have two books read but not reviewed, and I am close to finishing a couple more. I do not want to be more than two reviews behind.

Cee - Thank you so much for your kind words. I am so glad that something I said rang true for you. I have five sisters myself, but I am only close to two of them - Julie, who practically raised me, and Cindy, who is the oldest of us and keeps an eye on everyone. She is definitely a mother hen, but a very fun and funny one. She doesn't cook, so the kids love when she visits because she brings things like Chex Mix, which she swears is an appetizer, and platters of towered Ding Dongs and Swiss Cake Rolls, which is an elegant dessert. She tells the kids, "Who needs Betty Crocker when Little Debby is so obliging?!"

We do often drive thru McDonalds before going to the park with the dogs - I love the iced tea, also - no sugar, please. Thanks for you good wishes about the house.

Dee - I think our different experiences of motherhood are fascinating, too! I can't imagine being jealous of my own child. I have seen a lot of things over the years, and the one that always gets me is the mom who feels like she needs to compete with her children. Mom's of teenage girls who will dress like their daughters or mention that their daughter is cheerleading and then launch into a story about when she (the mother) was a teenager. What's up with that? Sounds like you are doing so great with your two boys, and I bet you would have been great with a daughter, too. Your thoughtful approach to motherhood tells me that you would. And trust me, if you 14 year old is saying that he has the best parents now, then he will still be saying it when he is thirty. I don't worry about empty nest syndrome, although I do realize that we have only a few magic years left before things start changing as the kids go in their own directions. I hope I will be graceful about letting go and trust in the job that I have done. I hope I will embrace each new adventure.

Rachel - A nun? Wow! I do think we gain perspective with time and distance, which is a lovely gift. I feel like now I can look back and think about the choices that my Mom made and how she acted, and I can at least try to understand why she might have felt that way. I don't think I will ever totally get it because she is not the type to share, but I can ponder it without feeling hurt or bitter, and that to me is progress. It is what it is, and thinking about it will not change things, but it does make it possible for me to have conversations with my own kids about why Grandma is the way that she is. I don't have any real answers, I can say, but perhaps...

Kath - Thank you for the wonderful compliments! The positive thinking and the pushing of cool worked because it is oh so lovely here today. I am giving you the credit!

I would never make it as a nun - too many rules.

Susan - Please do send the rain, the poor grass here is gasping. It's parched! I loved your story of your trip to the market -I hate when it rains and you're trying to deal with groceries. Yuck! So my sympathies for your pain and for two sets of clothes before 10:30. You poor dear! It's supposed to be cooler this week here - in the eighties, so much, much better!

Chelle - Always lovely to see you, thanks for stopping in!

Caro - Love the image of the ex-priest whose sons are terrors on the ice hockey team! Too funny! You always have great stories - how do you manage that? By the way, I am still drooling from your party menu - and I WANT those cupcakes!

Ilana - Thinking of you today as you travel to your family gathering and hoping that things go well. Just think of yourself as the eccentric and sophisticated artist with an aura of mystery surrounding her. They are all jealous of you, darling, so pay them no mind. I'm glad you liked my analogy of my family - I would love to hear yours!! I hope today is kind to you. I will stop over later and see how things went.

Kath - No rain here. It was hot as Hades yesterday. Maybe rain today - that would be so wonderful!

Kathy - I really love that quote! I think I knew from early on that my parents weren't perfect, but I thought that my sister Julie had hung the moon. It wasn't until I was in college that I got to see her in a different light, and it was heart-breaking for me. When I was twenty, she was diagnosed with Hodgekins Lymphoma. She was pregnant at the time. Her doctors wanted her to abort the baby and begin treatment, but she had waited years to get pregnant, and there was no way she was giving up her baby. She carried the baby to term, he was born and barely made it - had to be sent to Riley Hospital for Children down in Indianapolis to be put on the ECMO machine - experimental at that time. She had to stay in Fort Wayne and begin chemo and radiation treatment as she had progressed to stage four at that time. It was horrible. I had never seen her so fragile and vulnerable. She had always been the strong one, and now she needed me to take that role, and I felt unequal to the task. It was eye-opening. It is hard to be strong and steady and to take charge. She had taught me everything, but not how to right the universe. I still look back on that time and wonder that any of us made it.

I think you are so right that we are the result of our experiences both good and bad. So well said on your part. It's like that saying that everyone we meet writes on the slate of who we are -I think that is also true. It's important to understand that the experiences we provide our children with shapes them in ways that will be visible years from now. We must be careful with their psyches and their hearts because our words and our actions will live so much longer than just the moment that they occurred in.

Kath - All is well in Mamie-land! We didn't have to hang out in the heat - we were just hanging out. I didn't melt, although it was a close call! Now I need to get caught up because I missed an entire day on here. Thanks for waiting for me!

Glad to hear it has finally cooled off but reading about all you did yesterday and are planning to do for today I feel like heading right back to bed!! Have a good one :-)

Mamie - what a heart rending story about your sister above. It is funny what makes this group open up so completely to each other, but it is so liberating.

Love your family Bones marathon! Nate and I love that show

Morning Mamie (I'm not sure it's still morning but you know I like saying it)- I'm enjoying a gorgeous day. It's so nice to have the house open again.
Glad you've been having a nice weekend with the kids. Enjoy!
BTW- I'm just over 2/3rds done with something Wicked. It's been excellent.

Reba - All I'm doing today is washing the bedding, watching Wimbledon, and reading - so relaxing, really. And I am really soaking up being on the deck without feeling like I am melting, so that's excellent. But hey, if you feel like heading back to bed, you should do that because it's the weekend, right?! Hope you have a good one, whatever you decide!

Paul - I think people open up on here because people are actually listening - a refreshing change! This is such a warm and welcoming group, they make you feel safe. And you're right - it is liberating.

Chelle - It's one of our favorites! We also love Justified, Castle, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Firefly, Glades, The West Wing, The Closer...

Mark - You can say Morning Mamie regardless of the time of day - I like how it sounds! I'm enjoying the weather, too. I feel perfectly giddy about it! I am loving Wicked, too! Can Bradbury write or what?!

Okay. I am not very far into Something Wicked and I have decided to blame it on your thread!! Man, it is easy to get behind here. : ) Seriously, what great, open discussions you host here. Thank you so much! And to all your contributors as well. It is amazing how sharing our difficulties as well as our joys can make people feel not-so-alone.

Good grief, I talk too much. I will take credit for the cool down though..

Kim - I will happily take the blame. I love how everybody chimes in and shares their thoughts and experiences. " And to all your contributors as well. It is amazing how sharing our difficulties as well as our joys can make people feel not-so-alone." - Amen, sister!

Kath - You DO NOT talk too much! Please don not stop talking over here!!! And again, thanks for the cool down - you have made me so very happy!

Hi Mamie!
You and I are sweet enough. We don't need sugar in our iced tea! LOL
You are having so much fun with life. I think you are rubbing off on me or something. Carry on!

LOL! *comes to attention and salutes* Yes, ma'am!

Mamie- All you sweet people! Isn't it wonderful. I finished Train Dreams. I really enjoyed it. He's just a strong evocative writer. I just started Insurgent. She pulls you in quickly. It's a perfect later in the day read.

OK, so we made our melty monsieur and it was absolutely delicious. The original recipe calls for Canadian bacon, which Birdy does not like, so we made two versions - one with Canadian bacon and one with ham. I am thinking that this would be a good way to repurpose leftover turkey after Thanksgiving - you could even use the cranberry sauce as a spread and add a thin layer of leftover dressing if you wanted.

Hi Mark! So glad you liked Train Dreams - I thought for sure you would. I am dying to get to Insurgent, definitely need to get to that this month.

Ooh, the melties look tasty! My wife, my daughter and a friend of ours have read Insurgent, so I thought I better hop to it. Actually, my wife & daughter reread Divergent first, which was a smart idea. I did NOT have the time.

I wondered if I should reread Divergent first - you can let me know how you feel about it.

Those look delicious!!! yummy! I have not been drawn toward Divergent, to tell the truth.
But I am not opposed to trying it sometime. I do have it on my digital library loan list..
I am such a mood reader, I just don't know what will happen if it ever lands in my inbox.

And I do talk too much.. yikes.. you must have responded to me five time.. yikes!
Feel free to condense in the future :)

They were delicious - absolutely fabulous and oh, so easy. I loved Divergent, but I like that type of story. It really pulls you in and for me was unputdownable. You do not talk too much - your messages were over the course of three days. I just responded to the posts in order, but next time I will condense! You are so funny! (I mean that in the best possible way)

I liked the books by Kristin Cashore, and look forward to the rest of them. So I have been looking at Divergent.. but havent felt the tug, really.

Funny is okay.. Intention.. I can feel it :)

You are right on about melty monsieurs being a perfect way to repurpose turkey left-overs...in fact I may bake a turkey breast just to do that!! My husband might not even miss salt in that recipe.

As to going right back to bed, glad you had a quieter day today so I could stay up and read, visit friends and watch the men's final :-)

Kath - Don't read it until you feel the tug. I need to get to those Cashore books. Funny is good - as in you always make me smile.

Reba - I might try them with turkey myself because I think they would be so tasty. Glad you got to stay up - let me know if you need me to have more quieter days so that I can help you out!!

Thanks for helping, Mamie, because I need to stay up -- I've got lots to do before we head out for Chautauqua a week from Friday. lol

I do love the Cashore books, alas they are on nook... What is your plan for the day? Anything
fun? Just lying low and relaxing at home?

Mornin' Mamie!
Those melties look awesome. Would be great for breakfast... hmmm

Reba - Happy to help!

Kath - Taking it easy today so that Reba can stay up! Nothing major as far as I know - I need to get hair appointments for everyone as we are becoming a shaggy group. I need to finish up Something Wicked... and write a couple of reviews. Might try a new recipe just for fun.

Morning Cee! Oh - they would be good for breakfast! Why didn't I think of that?!

Morning Mamie (Hey, I got to say it twice!)- Enjoy your day and enjoy the rest of something Wicked, I should be finishing it.

Mamie - seeing the melted cheese has reminde dme that I'm hungry and I need to get home to SWMBO to see what delicacy she has concocted for me this evening.
She loves Castle too by the way. I think the way four characters stand in line and take it in turns to bandy ideas - so unreal but great entertainment. His bodysuit with 'WRITER' on it is priceless.

Something Wicked.. it was such an Ahhhhhh read for me :) A sink into and be right there kind of book..
Luck to Reba.. lol

Mark - I hope to finish it up today, too. I will be waiting to hear your thoughts on whether or not I need to reread Divergent before plunging into Insurgent - I know that Roth purposefully chose not to recap the storyline from the first book, so I am wondering about that as it has been a year since I read it.

Paul - I love that bodysuit, too! Hope there are delicious things in your very near future!

Hi Mamie, I'm home again, trying to catch up on threads...... sounds as though you had a nice relaxing tennis and toenail sort of weekend. Not to mention the croque monsieur festival.

Hi Lucy! I hope you had a good time at the wedding; I'm sure you enjoyed the excuse to snag a bit of time with your daughter.

Mamie, just swinging through while I wait for time to move on to the next family activity. I'm in a room with three kittens..... they are distracting.....

The melty monseur looks very delicious.

I'm not really getting much reading done, but I'm having a good family visit. I still have my fingers crossed for your sale....

Hi Ellen! So glad you are having a good family visit. Thanks for the crossed fingers! Aw, kittens...I think you should sneak one of those kittens home with you.

Great minds, Mamie... I was thinking the very same thing :)

See Ellen, Kath thinks so, too!!! You NEED one!

"tennis and toenails weekend" -- I LOVE it!!

Reba - I'm taking it easy today, so I hope you are getting a lot done!!

So far I've had breakfast, discussed trip itinerary with hub, and am checking my email. Need to get out and walk before it gets too warm and then have several errands to run today. If you stay in that comfy chair with that book I think I"ll make it. lol

Just to say that I'd recommend re-reading the last chapter of Divergent and then moving onto Insurgent!

Mamie - almost anything covered with melted cheese on toast would taste good ... with the exception of peanut butter & jelly. I tried ... I wouldn't recommend it except for people who liked the vomit flavored Harry Potter jelly bean.

I just knew there would be house news here, Mamie. It is good news, though, about cooler temps. Same here. I'll pop back here in a few days. Not much LT time this week for me. Have a good one!

Reba - I stayed in the comfy chair so you must have gotten everything done!

Dee - Thanks for that info - that's what I'll do!

Caro - Good to know! And ewww to the jelly beans.

Donna - The people who were at the house forever last Thursday will not be making an offer. Their realtor said that they absolutely loved the house but that the yard is too big. What?! So then why was she showing them a 2 acre property!! I just don't get it. But you're so right - the cooler temps are wonderful. I feel positively giddy about it!!

Hi Mamie, I just got caught up here and I have to tell you that your story about your sister Julie brought tears to my eyes. Families can be the most wonderful thing in the world, or a huge drain on your emotional well being. I'm one of the lucky ones, having had a wonderful relationship with my Mom who is now 91.

All this talk of Insurgent is making me really want to get to that book as I loved Divergent so much. I can see trying to fit it in before year end for sure.

Judy - You are so lucky to have a wonderful bond with your Mom. What a gift that is - and she is lucky to have you, too. My sister Julie's son just turned 24 at the end on last month - I usher June in and he escorts it out! He is seriously thinking about moving down to Georgia with us when we go, which I would absolutely love. And you're right - families can definitely run the entire gamut when it comes to emotions.

I am really wanting to get to Insurgent this month. Now if only this month had about two additional weeks of reading time added to it...

>170 Crazymamie: Their realtor said that they absolutely loved the house but that the yard is too big. What?! So then why was she showing them a 2 acre property!! I just don't get it.

I think I can answer that. People fail to tell their realtors about ALL the things that are important to them. They probably never mentioned lot size so the realtor thought they'd be thrilled with a nice big lot. Go figure.

Ok, Bonnie, that makes sense. I didn't think about that. She did say that she thought if they were ten years younger they would have scooped it up.

Perhaps I could interest the couple in a ride on the carousel in Something Wicked This Way Comes - going backwards of course?!

Thanks Mamie, I checked everything off of today's list and even got some chair-time myself :-) Now, about tomorrow....

Hi Mamie. 51 posts in 24 hours. That's even more than Paul has. So unless I find out you've just sold the house, or one of your kids has received the Nobel Prize (hey, all those winners presumably have/had parents, right?), I'm going to stick to just popping in this time and saying hello. I'm so tired I could cry right now...

Reba - LOL!! I have a few errands to run tomorrow, and I want to try a new recipe. Should be another good day for you because I love to cook - it's relaxing.

Ilana - Thanks for popping in! Nope, haven't sold the house or given birth to a Nobel Prize winner...yet. Sorry you are so tired. Yesterday was a long day for you, you need to pamper yourself. I'll pop by your thread in a bit.

Mamie... Go surf my pinterest page and see if you can find any recipes there ?
http://pinterest.com/mckait/
Or do you already have one..

I haven't done anything of value.. but tomorrow's another day.
Hope everything is going well for you :)
I am in too weird a day to even explain :P

I will hopefully be back to normal tomorrow..
Take care of you and be safe...all of you...

Kath - I have one, but I surf your pinterest page anyway because I'm always looking for new ones to try.

Tomorrow is indeed another day - sorry for the weird day. And you did too do something of value - you came over here and visited, and that was valuable to me. I will check on you tomorrow and send good thoughts your way in the mean time.

Mamie- Both my wife and daughter reread Divergent first. It's probably a very good idea, especially for people who don't have hundreds of other books to squeeze in. I like Dee's advice and I might just do that anyway.

"especially for people who don't have hundreds of other books to squeeze in"

I guess that leaves me OUT! I'm going with Dee's idea.

Dee's a genius!

G'night, Mamie!

Mark - Yes sir, she is!

Sweet dreams, Cee!

Hi Mamie! I had to swing by and check out your thread since you name is popping up on all the threads that I've been visiting. :) It also helps that you are on the list of people who have similar library as me, which only means that you have GREAT taste!

Valerie - Welcome to my thread! So we share GREAT taste? "This could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship..." Checked out your profile - LOVE your rating system!!

Book #67: The Worst Hard Time by Timothy Egan

The May read for the Steinbeckathon was John Steinbeck's amazing book The Grapes of Wrath. Because I had just read it less than a year ago, I chose to read this recommended nonfiction work that explores that same time period. I stole the idea from Ilana, so thanks Ilana!

The Worst Hard Time explores the back story to the 1930s Dust Bowl storms. Egan took a unique approach to telling the story by exploring personal accounts of those who lived in the Dust Bowl prior to, during, and after the great storms that swept a way of life literally into the air. This is gripping narrative non-fiction that presents a face to the story while anchoring the events firmly into the historical timeline. It is heartbreaking to read about the cold hard facts that created the conditions that made the dust storms not just possible but inevitable. My only criticism would be that Egan jumps around from vignette to vignette in a somewhat disorderly fashion, making parts of the book seem repetitive. It could also stand to be just a bit shorter. Still, a 4.5 star read and definitely recommended.

" At its peak, the Dust Bowl covered one hundred million acres....More than a quarter-million people fled the Dust Bowl in the 1930s. Looking around now, it may seem that most people just hurried through the southern plains or left in horror. Not true. John Steinbeck told part of the story, about getting out, moving somewhere green. Those were the Exodusters. But Steinbeck's exiles were from eastern Oklahoma, near Arkansas - mostly tenant farmers ruined by the collapse of the economy. ...Not much was heard about the people who stayed behind, for lack of money or lack of sense, the people who hunkered down out of loyalty or stubbornness, who believed in tomorrow because it was all they had in the bank. Yet most people living in the center of the Dust Bowl, about two thirds of the population in 1930, never left during that hard decade."



Book #68: Farewell Summer by Ray Bradbury

I loved this book. Last month I joined the group read of Dandelion Wine in honor of Ray Bradbury's passing, and fell in love with both the story and the writing. Farewell Summer is a continuation of that story. In the afterword of the book, Bradbury states that he originally intended for this book to be part of Dandelion Wine, but that his publishers felt that it made the book too long and that it would be better to polish it some more and release it as a sequel. So, it basically picks up where DW leaves off. It is very well done, and I fell in love with Douglass' grandpa in this one. Highly recommended.

"Grandpa's library was a fine dark place bricked with books, so anything could happen there and always did. All you had to do was pull a book from the shelf and open it and suddenly the darkness was not so dark anymore. Here it was that Grandpa sat in place with now this book and now that in his lap and his gold specs on his nose, welcoming visitors who came to stay for a moment and lingered for an hour."

Farewell Summer -- on the list. Thanks for another day to work on the chore list tomorrow :-). Enjoy your cooking.

I love the sound of the Ray Bradbury books, Mamie. And The Grapes of Wrath has long been on my list, except my library has lost it. It may now be available as an ebook, however, so I will have to make some time for it.

Now, I have a dilemma, and there are many wise people on this thread, so I thought I would ask here. I have to go to New York next week, where apparently it is going to be 38C, and I will probably melt into a little pool on the footpath. I am digging out short-sleeved tops to wear under jackets, and switching to finer denier tights. In theory, I could do without a coat. But I seldom even leave my house without a coat, and I never leave London without a coat (it's a security blanket sort of thing). Can I leave the *country* without a coat, or would that just be too freaky? I'm only going for a couple of days, but I remember back to the ash cloud, when there were no flights for days, and I imagine being stranded overseas with no outer garment and falling temperatures. It might rain, I suppose (heavy showers are forecast, although it is the BBC weather forecast, which is basically just guesswork) but do people wear coats in all that heat, even in the rain? Or do they just use umbrellas? In London it is hard to be overdressed because the weather is so awful, but we never get heat like you're all having in the US.

182: Dee's a genius!

I don't think I've seen that written down before but I like it :-)

I should probably add that my copy of Divergent was from my son's school library so I can't check everything you need to remember is in the last chapter but it's definitely the action at the end of the book which is significant in Insurgent.

187: I love how you captured the power of the The Worst Hard Time in one paragraph, Mamie. It sounds well worth reading. And I must remember that Dandelion Wine has a sequel, when I finally get around to reading it.

189: Will listen with interest to the advice given on this one. Living as I do in the north of England, I can't help much but a friend of mine was in New York last summer when the temperature was in the 30s and she said she could hardly breathe when she was outside but all the buildings and transport she used were really well conditioned so most of the time she was fine. Is it a work trip, Susan?

I have GOT to read that one!

So, what's the plan for today? anything fun?

Susan, As I taught my kids.. always take a sweater. A/C if nothing else will
make you wish you had something. If it were me, I would take a lightweight cardigan and a
light weight jacket, too.

Reba - You will like it. Get your chores done, but make sure you take time to relax, too! And I almost always enjoy cooking.

Susan - I am beginning to think that anything by Bradbury is good! And The Grapes of Wrath is one of my all time favorites - would definitely make my top ten of all time, so, yes, make time to get to it.

The jacket dilemna...hmm...I almost always get chilly in air conditioning so I usually take a light cardigan or jacket along just in case. I have never been to New York, so I do not know what the norm is there - you need someone more travel savvy than I. But Kath's idea is good, and I am sure you will get a lot of advice from others here.

Dee - I will start by reading the last chapter, and then if after beginning Insurgent I feel lost, I can always go back and reread a bit more. So, yes, you ARE a genius!

The Worst Hard Time is definitely worth reading - very well done. I learned a lot. Dandelion Wine is not to be missed - I absolutely loved that one.

Kath - Yep - must read it! No big plans. Library, bank, post office. Finish up Something Wicked - almost done now. Start East of Eden. New recipe for dinner. Should be a good day. How about you?

Sorry I was wandering.. Nothing much planned. Just hoping to see the boys..
take our for dinner or going out.. I hope.

Maybe a book? :)

Crossing my fingers that you get your dose of the boys today. And yes, take out or going out for dinner sounds good. A book ? YES!

I have a book I want to read, but my plans were derailed yesterday.
ah well.. it is still waiting patiently :)

Susan, I second Kath's advice to bring one or two light cardigans, though I don't think a light rain coat would be out of bounds or make you look/feel conspicuous if it rains.

I live in Toronto. Similar weather. I take either a light sweater or a pashmina to use if the a/c is too cool. And I hardly ever wear a coat in the rain. Just an umbrella

We all collect here to tell bits and pieces.. have you noticed Mamie..
you draw it out with the good energy here :)

Mamie- Great review of The Worst Hard Time. It looks like you are going to be able to snag a few more readers. As you know, I LOVED that book and it was a top read for me last year.
I'll have to find a copy of Farewell Summer. Sounds like another winner by Mr. Bradbury.

ETA- Make sure you post your reviews. Thumbs are waiting!

You beat me to it, Mamie ... I was going to suggest another Bradbury weekend GR and was going to pick Farewell Summer.

I was thinking to turn this into a tribute to Bradbury year of GRs. ;-) .... Maybe.

I would love to read Farewell Summer...but not sure if I will join a GR for it ...
If the last two days are any indication...I have quit reading.. lol

Goodness you are hard to keep up with lately! LOL Books read and thread chugging along at a fast pace.

You got Thumbs!!

Kath - The great thing about books is that they ALWAYS wait patiently. Although sometimes they do call out to me, begging me please, now. Thank you so much for the wonderful compliment in 198. As to the reading - maybe you are just taking a break from reading, Kath, you know...to regroup. We need that now and then. Our brains get busy with other stuff and then it is hard to read for a while.

Waves to Katie and Cathy - thanks for weighing in, ladies.

Mark - Thank you! I posted the reviews just for you!

Caro - Farewell Summer would make an excellent group read as it is even shorter than Dandelion Wine and Something Wicked. You can still do it as a group read - I would follow that discussion. I think the tribute to Bradbury year of GRs is a truly great idea - I would be up for that. I was going to continue reading through his works anyway.

Hi Kim! What's cooking?

Thanks, Mark!

Bradbury seems to be hot around the threads these days. Will have to get to one of his books this month and see what all this fuss is about. :)

Valerie -You won't be sorry. His writing is wonderful and poignant - some rare kind of magic there.

Hahaha Valerie you have been away a while haven't you! The Group read of Dandelion Wine was done in his honour as he had just passed away and reminded so many what a great writer he was.

Great, wonderful conversations happening here!

Hi Paul! The group read also introduced some of us to his writing - Dandelion Wine was the first thing that I read by him with the exception of his short story There Will Come Soft Rains.

Linda!! So fabulous to see you feeling better and out and about on the threads! Glad you enjoyed the conversations going on over here.

Great reviews! Since I liked Dandelion Wine, I should try Farewell Summer..

The Worst Hard Time was a favorite non-fiction book for me the year I read it. It was just amazing what those poor people went through.

Hi Terri! Yep, you should try Farewell Summer. It was amazing what those people went through - I really learned so much with that read. I really love non-fiction when it is written like that.

I am going to have to read it.. I know I am. sigh. There will be no
avoiding Farewell Summer, it is clamoring at me now. I was fine when I
had no idea it existed, lol. But that and the one that Cee found will need to be read.

So did you try a new recipe? What did you make? I need to figure out something for today.

Morning Mamie- It's wonderfully cool start to the day here. Love it. Have a nice one.

Morning Kath! Yep, you have to read it. Are you talking about the Bradbury that Cee found at the library sale? I did try a new recipe, and to my surprise, everyone loved it. I thought that Dan, Abby and I would like it, but didn't know about Rae and Birdy. It was quick and easy to make, too, so double bonus. We forgot to take a picture, which just goes to show you how quickly we dug in. The recipe says that it makes four servings, but I think it's more like six. If Craig had been here, I think we would have finished it off.

Sausage and Black-Eyed Pea Hash

8 oz. diced turkey andouille sausage (I used 16oz. of reg. andouille sausage - Johnsonville)

2 stalks sliced celery

1 cup chopped fresh tomato

1 med. red bell pepper, cubed

1 medium yellow squash, cubed

1/4 cup water

2 tsp. chopped fresh thyme

2 tsp. cider vinegar

2 tsp. Dijon mustard

1 (15- oz) can no-salt added black eyed peas, rinsed and drained (I didn't have these, so I used frozen reg. peas instead)

1 Tbs. canola oil (I just used Pam) - it's for frying the eggs

4 large eggs (you really need one for each serving)

1/4 tsp. freshly ground black pepper

1. Heat a large nonstick skillet over med-high heat. Add sausage; sauté 4 minutes or until lightly browned, stirring occasionally. Add celery and next three ingredients (through squash); sauté 3 minutes, stirring frequently. Add 1/4 cup water and next five ingredients (through peas). Simmer 2 minutes or until peas are thoroughly heated. (I then seasoned a bit with salt and pepper)

2. Fry one egg for each serving - you want the white to be set, but the yolk to be runny.

3. Place some hash on each plate; top each serving with one egg. Sprinkle each egg with black pepper.

The yolk creates a nice sauce for the hash. Everybody loved it, so this is a keeper recipe for us.

Morning Mark! It's fabulous here, too! 72 going to 88, nice breeze.

Hi Mamie, lovely review of The Worst Hard Time one of my all time favorites. I learned so much from that book including the fact that the Dust Bowl was a man-made creation. I had no idea. Must get to Bradbury.

Bonnie - Thanks! That is what was so staggering to me also. I didn't know that before either. It made me so sad when he was talking about how they purposefully killed off all of the buffalo, and drove the Native Americans away. It also puts things into perspective to find out that Native Americans still were not citizens and could be forcefully removed to reservations. I just learned so much - Egan takes a part of history that you think you were familiar with and then turns it inside out.

I know I posted after that recipe.. I know it ! sigh.

Well, basically what I said is that it looks delicious.

The Worst Hard Time is definitely not for me. What was done to the Native Americans is a
huge hot button issue for me. Unfairness always is. Americans are always so prideful..
but we started out as thieves, and now we are worshippers of greed. A Sadness.

So what's going on in Mamieland? Still dodging lookers?
Having fun with the kids? Summer is great for that :)
We had some good times too, just doing nothing much.

I have done that too, Kath - posted and for some reason it didn't take. The recipe was oh so good and so fast and easy to make. The big pay off was that everyone really liked it.

It is hard to read about what was done to Native Americans, but I also think that it is important to embrace history - the good, the bad, and the ugly so that we can learn from it. The history books that I was taught from in school certainly did not contain all of the ugly truths about what happened with all of the Native American nations of people. They present the same stories that we are already familiar with over and over again, and that is a very small portion of the truth. Now we have so much more information at our fingertips, and also all of these wonderful non-fiction books that read like novels, there is really no excuse not to know. Because we have home schooled for several years, I got to teach history to my children, and I wanted to present them with all of the facts, not just the beautiful and heroic ones. I can still remember being heartbroken to learn that Thomas Jefferson, the man who wrote those beautiful words about everyone being created equally, owned slaves.

Before reading The Worst Hard TIme, I thought the dust storms were a natural phenomenon - a natural disaster that occurred because of the lack of rain and the presence of the high winds and storms. I didn't know it was because we went out there and basically raped the land for profit. I did not know that all the topsoil that was lost in those winds would take over one thousand years to replace, and that could only happen if they followed the environmental guide lines that were set forth. Centuries of land lost in a handful of years - incredible.

Still, I do hear what you are saying - I have my own hot button issues that I cannot read about. We each have our own limits. My kids are still here and still learning about history, so I just feel very responsible for making sure that they get the full picture. When they are voters, I want them to understand that it is a hard won right and privilege, but that it is also a heavy burden that carries with it the weight of making sure that we do not repeat those parts of history that are shameful. It is not enough to say that we are all created equal, we must live it.

What's going on in Mamieland?

You're right that doing nothing much, but doing it together, equals good times. I am soaking them up. Yesterday, I spent almost all day out on the deck reading and holding court - that's what it feels like because the kids will always seek me out and come sit a spell to chat. I always learn a lot during those chats because they reveal themselves to me in their bits and pieces of sharing. Birdy is blazing through the books right now, and we are missing our Pod-packed books because there were lots of things to choose from in there. She has read the entire Michael Scott series, finished off The Sisters Grim series, charged through everything that I have pointed her toward, and is hungry for more. She has read 60 books so far this year. She just finished up Ruby Red and is dying to read the next one, but it doesn't come out until October. She is thinking about tackling either Pride and Prejudice or To Kill a Mockingbird - be still my heart!!

Abby is looking for a good murder mystery -what, is it Christmas?! She never reads mysteries! Rae and I gobble them all up ourselves. Now I feel the pressure of recommending the best fit because I do not want her to read just one. What to choose for a girl who loves classics and reads mostly fantasy or dystopias?

We are still doing school over the summer because we want to take our big break when we move, but we have relaxed things a bit to include things like sleeping in and ice cream runs. We have had no showings this week so far, but I am not surprised because the town feels dead. Loads of people are away on vacation. We will just enjoy the down time and continue to be ready. It will happen.

I have read many books about Native Americans and what we have put them through.. it is one
of my main interests.. All of the North American and South American cultures fascinate me. I totally agree that the kids are not given the full pictures in typical school settings. We did a lot of out of school reading here, too. That was one of the things we read. WE also read the classics.. they were not offered or suggested in school here. In fact, I never remember any of my kids ( or myself for that matter) having to read anything in this school district. That was fine with me..

I had my kids reading at age 3, all of them. So we read and read and read...

I am wracking my brain thinking of mysteries for your Abby. The Witch's Grave and I'm looking forward to more of that authors books. If she likes fantasy.. this has a little bit of "witchcraft" and it also has folk tales referred to . The Lumby Books? Or are those too light for her Lumby Lines

Glad to know that you have some down time ... and that you are enjoying it!

I took Canadian history in university and thought the classes did a pretty good job of highlighting the experiences of the First Nations people on our side of the border, although I don't think any kind of class will be able to completely cover the scope of the injustices inflicted on them as a culture, and a people. I think maybe it's because our side of the border didn't have anything "huge" besides the fur trade so Canadian history can pretty much be summed up with "Indians" and fur trading. At least that is basically all that is taught in the Canadian curriculum Nonetheless, it was eye opening and informative.

I dream of my toddler one day picking up a book and reading on his own. That would just make my day! :)

Kath - That is so interesting about the school reading. When I was in high school, we read several works by Shakespeare each year as well as a healthy dose of the classics. My kids weren't doing that in the public school system either - but they did read a lot of the Newbery winners. The thing about reading in the school system is that some teachers turn kids off of reading because they design big projects that go along with the books that essentially end up ruining the experience. The kids associate the process with the book. My son hates Bridge to Terabithia because of that - I think he would have liked it if they had just read it and talked about it. Other teachers seem to know how to make books come alive for the kids. Dan had this great teacher in fifth grade that had a policy where the kids read a book that was at least one hundred pages long every week - their choice of book. Then on Fridays the teacher took the time to sit with each of them individually and discuss the book - if the kid recommended the book to the teacher, he read it. Dan read a book every week of the school year and he loved it. As the teacher got to know their interests, he would recommend books that they might like. We have always read a lot as a family - when the kids were little, we read tons of the story books that they got from the library, but we also always had a bigger book going that we read just one or two chapters a day from. We love audiobooks for long car rides. Now it is so much fun to see what they choose on their own as well as what they are required to read for school. I started making a list of classics that I thought were important to read during the middle school years that we home schooled for, and we began making our way through it. I have been so happy that they have continued to read a heavy dose of the classics on their own. There are so many references to classic works that you miss out on a lot if you are not familiar with them. Some of the classics we started out with in graphic novel form and then progressed onto the real deal. I just bought the graphic novels and arranged them on the bookshelves without saying anything, and before I knew it they were asking me if they could read them. Then they wanted to read the actual novel. If I had made them read them, it wouldn't have been nearly as fun.

I am wracking my brain about the mysteries, too. Trying to think what would be a good fit for her. The two you mention above I have not read. They both look good! Is The Witch's Grave in that series that Terri was talking about on her thread? I tried to locate a copy of the first one in the series and it is not to be found. I need to try a used book store probably.

Mamie liked the look of your hash recipe and have passed it to SWMBO for future reference. Native American history is one of my interests too and I studied it for a year in University before I realised it wouldn't provide me any employment.

Valerie - I know very little about Canadian history. I don't think any one class could cover all of the injustices done on this side of the border, however, I think they should present a broader and more accurate picture as children progress through the school system.

How old is your toddler? I loved when the kids started reading on their own because it is like magic to them. We continued to read out loud to them even as they became very competent readers in their own rights. A shared love of reading often sticks, I think - it becomes part of who they are, and long after you have stopped reading to them, they will hear your voice and your inflections in the old familiar stories. They will carry that with them.

Paul - I hope Hani makes it - it was really good. Isn't it sad that some of the things we are most passionate about are just not lucrative? The more I learn about Native American history, the more I want to know.

Mamie, my little guy will be turning 2 at the end of August. I should be content since just a couple of months of ago, I couldn't even get him to sit in my lap for very long during storytime because he would keep squirming. Now, he will actually grab one of his books and bring them to me throughout the day, sit on my lap and listen contently for a couple of minutes before the next distraction lures him away. I really do hope to instill a love a reading and books with him so I will continue to give him as much exposure as possible. :)

I never really liked most of the books I was forced to read in school. But I think that's because they only picked books where people (or beloved pets) died. I wasn't mature enough to enjoy books like that when I was a kid. I'm not entirely mature enough now, either, though I've accepted that sometimes characters have to die to tell a story properly. But WHY oh WHY do they force kids to read so many depressing books???????? Can't we have a little happiness too? Or is that just Catholic schools that like having depressed kids? ;)

Have you read The Sisters Grimm? I'm reading the Grimm fairy tales right now and thought if The Sisters Grimm does a good job of incorporating the original fairy tales into their plots, I might be interested in supplementing my Grimm reading...

Two! Oh, how I loved two! The Napping House and Goodnight Moon and Piggies, Going to Sleep on the Farm, Brown Bear, Brown Bear...I could go on and on. I love those books. Next year he'll be ready to start flushing things down the toilet! And saving the world - I think little boys are required to do that.

Goodnight Moon is a staple in our house. So much so, the pages are falling part. :)

Rachel -Very good point. Ever notice how so many of the Newbery books are really sad. I just read your post out loud to my daughter Abby (who is sixteen), who came out to join me on the deck, and she couldn't agree more. She is naming off books - Island of the Blue Dolphin, Where the Red Fern Grows, Shiloh, Old Yeller... Historical fiction is a great want to combine Language Arts and History, but there are a lot of good books out there to choose from that are not sad.

I have read some of The Sisters Grimm - they are really great, but not an accurate incorporation of the original fairy tales. For example, Prince Charming is anything but charming. The stories are imaginative and loads of fun - the fairy tales are completely fractured.

Valerie - We went through several copies ourselves! I will tell you that if he has a book that he absolutely adores that is not a classic, buy an extra copy of it for him to have later. My daughter had this counting book that she loved, and we had read it so many times that I had it completely memorized - we wore it out. A few years later, when Abby was born, Rae wanted that book so that she could read it to Abby, but it was out of print. I wish I had a copy of it to give to her if/when she has children because it would be such a great shared memory.

Hi, Mamie! Woo, the joint is hopping!

Sorry I'm coming in late and brain-addled on the "what mystery" question, but has The Westing Game been mentioned? It won a Newberry, and my daughter has loved it forever - she still re-reads it once a year.

We continued to read out loud to them even as they became very competent readers in their own rights.

We did too! For years :)

I could be wrong about the school reading, but I have tried hard to remember.. there was one teacher who did a single Shakespeare..I think? My kids read so naturally though, that it is possible they read without my realizing they were reading a specific book? I just know that this district was unimpressive. Now they spent time in other districts ... but ?I do not remember any specific reading. It could easily be my failure.. it has been a while. But there was so much reading here at all times... hard to remember. I do know that we had did the classics at home. Sometimes together, when they were older, indificually.

I think she would be okay starting with Book 2 in the DEPOY series.. but ask Terri.. she read them all, so far I think? I started with#2 and didn't feel that I missed anything much? But I would def. ask Terri. I think you can find most of them on Ammy Marketplace?

We never read Goodnight Moon. Not even once. :P

Kath, you are missing out..haha! I actually didn't read it much since Daddy does bedtimes so he's memorized the whole book. It's a sweet ritual seeing him rocking our son and just softly whispering the words like a lullaby. Melts my heart each time. :)

I think we might try The Witch's Grave and read it at the same time. Ammy doesn't have it - or the first one - what's up with that? It's available on Nook, which we don't have, but also for iPad, so I think we'll do that. Why doesn't anyone have the first book, I wonder?

No Goodnight Moon - Rae loved that book.

http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/0373265255/ref=nosim/librarythin08-20

they do they do! on the marketplace..

Hi Mamie! Doing my best to keep up with you. Interesting discussion topics as usual. Liked your review of The Worst Hard Time and have to agree with you.

Mamie, I'm so glad you enjoyed The Worst Hard Time. I read it last year and was very glad I had done so when I dug into The Grapes of Wrath in May. I agree that they are great companion reads. And I'm still wanting to get to some of the Ray Bradbury reads. He has really enjoyed a comeback since dying. Well, maybe he hasn't enjoyed it exactly...... being dead and all.....

Ooh, that was an irreverent moment.

I escaped Tennessee without bringing home a kitten. They were adorable and I did consider buying a soft-sided carrier and bringing one home, but I figure there are kittens in WA state that need homes, too, if we decide to go that route.... Distracting, that's what those cuties were!

Kath -Thank you - how did I miss that?

Ilana - Thank you! Hope today was kind to you. I loved the piece of art that you have been working on lately - so very fabulous! I just cannot believe how very talented you are! And how fun to be in on the step by step process!

Ellen - Welcome home! No kitty - boo to that. How did you resist? Your Bradbury slip up made me smile, so I am so very thankful that you didn't edit it out! And yes, make sure to get to some of his books - can't believe I went all these years without reading Dandelion Wine or Something Wicked This Way Comes. Did you have fun in Tennessee?

Hi Crazy! Great recipe. I printed it out for later use. : ) It's so gratifying when you see your kids turned on to reading. Some of mine more than others, but still.

:) I just got lucky. I found one there for myself. I am about to start on book #3. I
hope that you and Abby like the bok :)

I just finished The Celtic Conspiracy and enjoyed it.

:)

Ooh, I like the sound of Mamieland! A place filled with books, and book lovers, beer, moderate temperatures, good food, did I say beer?

Mamie- Hope you had a good day! Not bad in the shade.

Kim - Hope you like it as much as we do! And it is so gratifying - you're right. I love that no matter what, we will share a love of books.

Kath - Thanks again. I am excited to read it - and so is Abby!

Mark - There was a nice breeze here for the entire day, so perfect in the shade. Beer? Right now I have Newcastle Brown Ale and Founders Dirty Bastard in the fridge. Probably not up to your standards - just a small town here, so limited selection, but it is very cold! I like the sound of Mamieland too - Kath coined the phrase!

I wanna go to Mamieland! Wah! No, I think both of those beers sound just fine.

You come on over any time you like. Actually, you should have come for dinner because we tried a new recipe for shrimp po'boys and paired it with roasted potato wedges. Very tasty.

If you are interested in learning about American History and about native Americans, I highly recommend Howard Zinn A People's History of the United States. In addition, if you haven't read Bury My Heart at Wounded Knee, this is one I recommend as well.

You might also try The Absolutely True Diary of a Part-Time Indian by Sherman Alexie.

Hugs to you!

Linda - So great to see you here! Thanks for those recommendations - I will definitely check them out. Hope you are still feeling better.

I second The Absolutely True Diary of a Part-Time Indian with 2 thumbs up, because that book was very real, but oh so funny at the same time. I rarely laugh out loud when reading a book, but that one had me in tears!

Thanks, Valerie - I am ON it. Adding it to the WL right now.

Val is absolutely right! The Absolutely True Diary of a Part-Time Indian is one of my very favorites. Bury My Heart is also wonderful, but without the laughs.

Morning Mamie- Sorry, I missed dinner (it sounds great!) and all I got was leftovers! I also loved Part-Time Indian!

Morning Kim! I have added both to the WL, and will make sure to get to them. Thanks for chiming in.

Morning Mark! You too? Bumping it up again - wonder if the library has it because I still have seven books to go off the shelves before I can start purchasing.

Just realized that it is Friday the 13th - which in this house is a lucky day because my first child was born on a Friday the 13th. It's funny because I had to be scheduled to be induced because I was so far overdue - she was due on February 19th (AND it was a leap year - I like to get credit for that extra day) but delivered on March 13th. Why do they say delivered anyway - it was more of a carry in. And they didn't bring the baby to me - I took the baby to them. Anyway, I digress...When the doctor told me that he was scheduling me for induction on the 13th, I said really...Friday the 13th?!! And he said, and I quote, "There is no way you will have the baby on the 13th. You will deliver on the 14th." Um.. he was wrong about that, as Rae arrived promptly at 9pm on the 13th. When the nurse asked me what we were going to name her I said Jason, and she said to me, "Ma'am, it's a girl." She was totally serious - she thought I was confused!! Tell me the rest of you get the film reference.

Yep. I'm impressed that you could make a joke about anything at that point!

It is noteworthy, isn't it, that so many of the prizewinning books are sad - it's just as true with adult prizewinners - films as well as novels. Serious aces pleasure and happy endings, I guess???

I also got the "Jason" reference, Mamie! That's so funny about the nurse - so polite, too.

I wonder whether prize-winning books are sad because "happy" books are seen as more of a girl thing (like romance novels, for example), and they just aren't valued as much as things boys like (look at all the sneering at romance when no-one sneers about formulaic crime novels, probably because their target audience is men). Or I could just be paranoid.

Thank you all for the coat suggestions further up the thread. I spoke to one of the girls working in New York the other day and she said 38C was like having a circle of fan heaters pointed at you, and not in a good way. So now I have settled for a scarf that I can wear on the way to the airport here in London (where it will, inevitably, be pouring with rain) and on the plane and in the hotel, and pack away for the business meeting. If I should somehow be stranded for days in falling temperatures, there is always Bloomingdales.

Hi Lucy! Good point - do you think that just like in the film industry, books with serious themes are taken more seriously than books with happier endings?

Susan - I think comedy never gets the same credit as tragedy. It gets tagged as frivolous or something, which is disheartening as comedy is essential to life. To my life, anyway. What would we do without laughter?

Your scarf idea sounds like the perfect solution - and you're right, there is always Bloomingdales!

So you were due the 19th and delivered the 13th of the next month?!?! I have never heard of anyone going that far over. That means you were pregnant for 10 months! I never would have made it, especially with my sense of humor intact. You have my undying admiration. I, on the other had, struggled to make it to 8 months for the only one of my brood that I actually incubated (adopted two out of three). ; )

I think comedy is harder to write than tragedy. And I wish it got more credit.

Yes - pregnant for ten months!! I had a regular practitioner, not an OB-GYN, and he was very conservative. (And this was twenty years ago) Needless to say, I switched after the delivery. Let's just say that my work group was OVERJOYED when I finally delivered. I worked the night shift in the chemistry lab at the hospital, and every evening when I walked in there were nudges and whispers, (oh my word, she still didn't have that baby) and for some strange reason they took me off the front desk rotation which deals with all the incoming phone calls.

Adopted - would LOVE to hear your adoption stories some time!

I also think that comedy would be harder to write than tragedy. Definitely should get more credit.

I'm told my poor mom carried me around for 10 months, and I was a whopper when I finally showed up. Sibling speculation has been I was plenty comfortable and in no hurry. I'm amazed you stayed at work so long.

Joe - I worked right up until I had her. Luckily for me she wasn't a whopper - she weighed in at just 6 lbs 12 oz.

Remarkable, Mamie - on both counts. I arrived at over 10 lbs. (My mom forgave me).

OVER 10 pounds!!!*faints*

LOL! I know. Good thing she liked me.

Must have been all that goodness inside of you!

Once in a while a humorous movie is so brilliant - like "It Happened One Night" that it sweeps all before it - ditto with books - but yes, there is a view, I think, that comedy is 'less important' - strange, given that without it, I don't know how I could manage.

Perfectly said, Lucy!

You are a champion to be pregnant for 10 months! I think I was done at about 7 months, but duty calls and I made it to the requisite 9 months, but those last couple of months were not a joy and my little guy was only 7 pounds.... The thought of doing it all over again makes me less than overjoyed... :)

Mamie, love the joke you tried on the nurse after your daughter was born. I got the reference, but I'm guessing she wasn't very used to women having a sense of humor at that particular moment..... heh.

I agree that humor is more difficult to do well than tragedy, but it does seem that tragedy gets more "credit", whether in literature, poetry.... I think sometimes writers are more inspired by pain than by joy.... I wonder if senses of humor are more disparate than senses of tragedy. That is, are we readers more consistent in our perception of what is tragic than we are in our perception of what is funny?

My first pregnancy was actually my worst one and the hardest delivery- it was all downhill from there. Plus, the first time is the scariest because you have never done it before. You feel more in control the next time. At least I did.

Ellen - That is such a wonderful point that you make! I had not even thought about it like that, but that makes sense. Think about all the different kinds of humor there are...dark, wry, sarcastic, slap- stick, ironic....You are a GENIUS!

So I picked up a copy of The Absolutely True Diary of a Part-Time Indian from the library today. I opened it up to read a few pages to get a feel for it, and when I put it down, I had finished it. I will post a review tomorrow along with my reviews for The Cold Dish and Something Wicked..., but let me just say that it is a wonderfully articulate book that both breaks and heals your heart. Thanks for pointing me towards it, Linda. And thanks to those of you who seconded Linda's motion.

Wow, Mamie- That's impressive! It is a book that grabs you pretty quickly. Look forward to these reviews. Hugs!

Wow, in one shot! That is impressive, but not totally unbelievable because it's such a good read! So glad you enjoyed it Mamie. :)

ETA: I forgot the UN in front of the believable which totally changes the meaning of my sentence. Oops!

I'm not really here, just catching up on the goings-on.

I've had Part-Time Indian in my stacks for too long already. Maybe I should follow your example and just have a quick look at the first page?

Bradbury is a can't miss for anyone who reads. Seriously. His books don't
belong in any genre aside from Bradbury imo. I have loved him for many years.

I look forward to your thoughts on Part Time Indian. I still have a Sitting Bull book in my shelf not read...
so had decided against getting any others right now..

Nothing much going on right now... but wanted to check in :)

Hi Mamie, I was going to add my endorsement of Part-Time Indian but I see I am too late, you've already read it. I loved the book when I read it, and like Valerie said, it's one of those books that can make you laugh and cry, often at the same time.

I also want to say how great it is to see how proud all Mamas and Papas are of their book-loving children. I remember being so happy when both the girls took to reading, I believe you are never alone as long as you have a book to pick up. It now looks like both the grandchildren will enjoy reading, perhaps the granddaughter a little more, but Clayton may come back to reading later in his life.

Mark - It only has 140 pages, and it's one of those books that just pulls you under. Hoping to get the reviews written this evening while my house is full of teenagers - movie night in Mamieland. They are watching the new Sherlock Holmes and Alien.

Valerie - You and everybody else were so right - a very good read. Plus, I was out on the deck and the weather was perfect, so...

Kath - I think you are 100% correct - Bradbury needs his own genre. I don't know how to classify them - magical? Definitely not sf. I think you would like Part-Time Indian. It's irreverent and poignant and funny all at the same time. Thanks for checking in. Always so happy to see you here.

Judy - Sure does make you laugh and cry at the same time. Loved the main character, but all of the characters were so real and believable. Not every writer can do that.

How wonderful for you to be able to share your love of reading with your grandchildren. It's a gift that just keeps on giving. What a great role model you are for them!

Book #69: The Cold Dish by Craig Johson

This book was so much fun. I loved the main character, Sheriff Walt Longmire. He seems to be an eclectic mix of Clint Eastwood and Andy Griffith - he gets the job done sometimes by force and sometimes by homegrown savvy. He knows how to do his job, and he doesn't pull any punches, and yet, at the end of the day, he is lost. His personal life has been on hold since his wife died four years earlier, and he is haunted by the injustice of the inadequate sentencing of the defendants in a rape case that he helped bring to trial a few years ago. Things are about to get interesting, though, because Walt's daughter, his best friend, and his secretary have hatched a plot to stir him from his self imposed exile. Oh, and Cody Pritchard, one of the defendants from that haunting rape case, has just been found dead - murdered. Is this a case of revenge - a dish best served cold - or something else altogether?

The very best part of this book are the characters which are fully drawn and articulated. The dialogue is crisp and gritty and full of humor. This cast of quirky and diverse individuals reminded me of the tv show Northern Exposure - remember that one? Except the setting is Wyoming, not Alaska, and the main character is a sheriff, not a doctor. Longmire is not new to the community like the doctor was, he is a fixture of this ranching world and he knows how to navigate the waters very well. What is so much fun is watching him do it. His best friend, Henry Standing Bear, is not to be missed. Johnson could write an entire book based just on Henry's character because he is no mere sidekick. I am so glad that this book is just the first in a series because I cannot wait to get back to Absaroka County.

"He closed the door, and I watched him saunter toward the court. The word insouciance was invented for Henry and, against it, the teenage version suffered. The Bear was doing vintage James Dean, and it made the boys look like a bunch of basketball-playing Pat Boones."

Book #70: Something Wicked This Way Comes by Ray Bradbury

This is the third book that Ray Bradbury wrote that was set in Green Town. I was disappointed at first because I was expecting this to be a continuation of the stories found in both Dandelion Wine and Farewell Summer. It is not. The stories merely share the same setting. However, my disappointment did not last long as I found myself once again entranced by that spell that Bradbury casts with his wonderful lyrical writing. I don't know how he does it, but the result is pure magic.

Will Halloway and Jim Nightshade live next door to each other and share everything, including, almost, a birthday. Will was born at one minute before midnight on October 30th, and Jim was born at one minute after midnight on October 31st. This year they will turn fourteen together. One week before that can happen, however, a mysterious carnival rolls into town. Not only is this the wrong season for carnivals, but this carnival is filled with a strange energy, and it is not very long before things start going awry.

Bradbury does an amazing job of building and sustaining the suspense in this novel. The boys are both repulsed by and mysteriously drawn to the carnival - what teenage boy wouldn't be. After all, people are disappearing and the carousel, which is supposed to be broken, can sometimes be seen running backwards to a tune that sounds eerily like The Funeral March being played backwards.

"For the Witch, though peculiar wax, was peculiarly alive. Blind, yes, but she thrust down rust-splotched fingers which petted, stroked the sluices of air, which cut and splayed the wind, peeled layers of space, blinded stars, which hovered and danced, then fixed and pointed as did her nose. And the boys knew even more. They knew that she was blind, but special blind. She could dip down her hands to feel the bumps of the world, touch house roofs, probe attic bins, reap dust, examine draughts that blew through people, draughts vented from bellows to thump-wrist, to pound-temples, to pulse-throat, and back to bellows again. Just as they felt that balloon sift down like an autumn rain, so she could feel their souls disinhibit, reinhabit their tremulous nostrils. Each soul, a vast warm fingerprint, felt different, she could roil it in her hand like clay; smelled different, Will could hear her snuffing his life away; tasted different, she savored them with her raw-gummed mouth, her puff-adder tongue; sounded different, she stuffed their souls in one ear, tissued them out the other! Her hands played down the air, one for Will, one for Jim."

Book #71: The Absolutely True Diary of a Part-Time Indian by Sherman Alexie

Review coming soon...

Man you are a reading machine! I've read other Alexie, must get to this one. My daughter's class read it in school, she had this 'oh it's a book for school' attitude - said it was 'pretty good' with a little sniff.

Yay - I think I'm caught up now! The Ray Bradbury books sound great and it's so exciting to hear about your kids reading.

Morning Lucy! In one tiny sentence you said so much about how your daughter felt about the book - how did you do that?! It's a quick read and really worth the time - what others have you read by him?

Morning Heather! All of the kids love to read, but Birdy and Abby are on fire this year - so fun to see. Birdy is reading a new book called Seraphina, which I am anxiously awaiting feedback on. I know it has dragons that can fold themselves into human shapes in it! Rae comes and goes - when she is in the zone, she can out read us all. She is waiting for several books to come out, and she is getting impatient - Tiger's Destiny, Endlessly, and the next book in the Divergent trilogy. You will be thrilled to hear that last month I purchased a few books by Diana Wynn Jones - Howl's Moving Castle, House of Many Ways, and Castle in the Air. I put them on the hutch in the living room and announced that Heather assured me that this author was brilliant and so we needed to read them. Abby sped through Howl's Moving Castle and then raved about the writing. I am to read it as soon as possible she instructs me. So there, you have won another fan over!

#127: (only some 158 posts later ... but better late than never) Thank you so much for sharing the story about your sister. It's very touching...

Hi Kathy! You're welcome, thanks for reading it. What are you working on right now?

Mamie - it's so wonderful that your kids are reading demons too. I grew up in a reading family as well, and my parents would sometimes talk me out of games I wanted to buy, but they'd willing take me with them to book fairs and never squawked when I picked out as many books as I wanted - as long as I could carry them myself ...well they had their arms full with their own prizes. haha... I think I developed strong arms because my determination to bring home all those bags of books outweighed the pain.

My non-reading friends (it's scary how many I have in RL) said their parents never read and they hated the books they had to read for school and mostly copied each other's book reports if they could.

My 16 yr. old is loving the Patrick Rothfuss fantasies - of course - she had to leave the second one Wise Man's Fear at home because of the Spanish pledge, but I imagine she will dive right back into it as soon as she gets home. The Pamela Freeman Castings Trilogy are very well written and plotted and imagined.... not funny though, the way Diana W-J could do so well.

Hi Caro! I am amazed at how many people don't read. In RL, I have very few people to talk about books with outside of my immediate family. It makes me sad. They are missing so much. And you're right - parents who love reading and share that love with their children generally pass along a lifelong love of reading. In our house, the kids save up their money for things like video games, but we always say, "Books are on the house" and so we order books and make trips to the library as often as needed. It's our luxury item!

Lucy - I have the Castings Trilogy on my WL, and will purchase it as soon as I have completed my ten books for Ellen's challenge...um, six more to go. Just checked out the Patrick Rothfuss books - those look VERY good. I will have to look into those. Thanks for the rec.

#286 I've seen some good reviews of Seraphina on some of the book blogs I follow so I will also anxiously await Birdy's feedback (as if I need another YA series to follow). And I'm thrilled to hear Abby loved Howl's moving Castle!

Mamie- I tell you, I really admire your reviews. Excellent job with both The Cold Dish & something Wicked. Big Thumbs! Funny, I never reviewed either one. Bad Mark, but you sure picked up my slack.
Have a great Sunday!

Heather - I'm sure she'll have it finished this week if she keeps reading at the pace she has been, so you shouldn't have to wait long. Abby really loved the book and the writing style, so I am sure there is much more of Diana Wynn Jones in her future. Now I need to get to it - maybe August?

Mark! Great to see you! Thanks for the thumbs and the compliments! 83 and sunny right now - possible showers later, which I hope we get. We did get a big rain storm last night which was great because we are dry as a bone here. Speaking of bones...

Great reviews Mamie. I have Something Wicked This Way Comes on my WL since so many Lter's are giving it such great reviews. And hopefully, I will get to read something of Bradbury's this month. I'll make it a priority. :)

Hi Valerie! Thanks! I plan on reading more Bradbury, too. I have The Martian Chronicles and I would really like to read Farenheit 451 which our library has.